Tomorow is a brand new day

Hello all, Iam going to try and be my old self again i used to be so positive and sitting in that drs office and alowing her to basicaly make me feel like im a nobody made me realize that I am a human and i do have feelings that do count, and that someone else might be feeling the same way as me but no one has a right to make them feel like i had felt, so i have decided to... take back my life and give my self the life it deserves. I will hunt and pray and ask for a doctor that will give me the referal and help me with my insurance's aproval, and I will pray that i can find someone who will fight for me to get the bariatrics surgery. I am not by anymeans a "smart woman" but i am a person who knows that diets do not work for me and i know that i can not loose weight like other people can. I have been through so much in my life and im sure there are many people that have also. I have never in my life wanted pitty but i have wanted to be treated fair, i belive that every person has that right too. The more i think of friday the madder i get, its not because of the "coment" she made but more of what she said right before that bad coment was made, she said "you cant get that surgery, your one of the medicaid people, i didn't think they'd do that for you" So that means im in a "class" its sad she doesn't even know me and i was being "classed" by her.. she doesn't know that I try very hard in my everyday life to be a helper, that i work for my church as a secretary for a few hours a week just to get by, cause i cant stand or sit to long or have the knowledge to do things like other people can on a regular job, i am not able to type to long cause my carpel tunnel (which i have already had surgery on two years ago) flares up so bad i don't even know if im touching the keys anymore and the pain from that when the tingleing stops is like a hot poker going right through my hands, she doesn't know that my husband is disabled and sometimes cant even bring himself to step out of our door for three weeks in a row.. she cant see me quietly reasureing him that its "ok people aren't out to get you" while thinking how bad i myself feel because in a way deep down i feel like im lieing to him because of people like her that "put us into a class" realy are bad people. and to be at home trying to help my 8th grade daughter complete her homework and not understanding it a bit, and the frustration from not know how to do things is so depressing, the fact that i cant do 8th grade school work and ive been through school makes me realy upset. and knowing that my 67 year young mom wont remember my name in a year or less because of a disease thats taking her from us little by little, my son graduates this year and he is barrowing a cap and gown from someone cause we didn't have the extra money to buy his, the intestinal problems we just found out about him is better than we had hoped for, Thank God. and on top of all of this I feel there is a reason why im going through this... its not because ive been a "bad person" all my life because i tell you i realy havn't, but im no angel either, Its because i know in my heart that i never ever want anyone else to go through what i went through last friday. So tomorow is another day, and i am going to bring my chin up and dust my pants off and get back on the sadle and try for another doc... I am going to bed with a prayer on my heart asking that no one go through what i went through and if they do that they be equiped with the right words to say back to the dr and a mind full of peace and put thir chin in the air and walk out the door and find another dr that will help them.. God bless you all, and take care Paula

Good for you Paula don't let anyone make you feel like less of a person EVERYONE DESERVES TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT!!! I wish you lived closer to Cincinnati as Dr. Curry at Deaconess Hospital is an amazing surg eon as well as a kind and compassionate human being. It might be worth the drive to see him. He and his staff are wonderful to work with and are a huge help in getting people approved for surgery. He did my surgery July, 7 2005 and it was the best thing I have ever done for myself. I have lost 85 pounds and have 20 to go to reach my goal. I feel he saved my life. My brother and sister-in-law lived in New Philly for years Paul and Diane Welsh, sadly my brother passed away Nov. 2004. I used to love to visit them to get a "shot of small town" we lived in Chicago until 2 years ago when we moved to Cincinnati. I love being back home in Ohio. Good Luck in your journey. I hope you can find a surgeon who will work with you and take care of your weight issues so your back will be easier to deal with. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Judi

Its funny how you said that about Cinnci.. My family and i just went down to Dayton for the first time last monday as a vacation..lol. we went the WPAF to see all the planes and up to Ohio caverns. I so loved them but that is aslo what gave me my back pain so bad, i was on my feet and walked for more than a mile and in the car for more than my body wanted me i cant wait till i can have wls I want to walk and walk and walk. I sure pray that people that can walk/run/exercise and do general things, have fun doing it. I know that there will be days where i "just can't bring myself to exercise, there may be sick days and the overal overwhelming i just cant days" and i know a lot of people that go through that, so i will not cloud my mind with fussy wassies and think everything is going to be just "great" when the surgery is done, i know thats when the real challenge will begin.. but i sure am looking forward to being able to finaly do just that.. hee hee. I to wish i was closer to Cinnci and could get into Dr. C, my insurance?? I feel im going to have a battle with them.. I sure pray that i don't.. Thank you so much for your thought and prayers those are so welcome to have.. I hope your day is filled with lots of smiles, take care and God bless you Paula