pity party

Hi, I'm pretty new here. I spent today having my psych eval and nutrition meeting. I'm ready to submit to insurance. I just want to sit here and cry because I'm so scared. I'm afraid I will back out and regret it for the rest of my life. Feeling pretty lost right now. Cindy B.

Cindy, Follow your heart..... You need to be ready and strong for the surgery.... If you dont feel it is time..... You can give it 6 months to find out what you want !!!!! My feelings about the surgery !!! I was first worried. I read as much as I could and got myself as educated as I could.. With the good and bad clear dowm to the memorails.By the time I made my mind up. I knew what I was doing. You need to read alot of profiles and find out if this is for you...... I myself just made the best decision of my life for myself..... 9 days out I feel great...... It will only get better. The main rule with this surgery is to follow your doctors instructions/ Good luck with your dicission Take Care Barb

Cindy, You are feeling normal feelings. I knew with all my heart and soul that I wanted the surgery more than anything, but when all the jumping through the hoops was over and it was "really" time to schedule, I got a little nervous. Its all about the unknown. We fear the huge changes that are bound to happen in our lives. Even the good changes are scary. Suddenly you are losing weight and feeling better. You can no longer use the excuse of not being able to do something because you are too overweight. You have to learn to deal with issues that you stuffed with food before. And it can make you pretty frightened. But I am speaking from my own experience, If I hadnt gone through with the surgery I dont think I would be alive now, and if so I would of been so full of regrets about chickening out. It has not been a perfect easy road, but I would do it again in a heartbeat. I have gone from 310 pounds to 182 in four months and feel better than I have in 20 years. Heck Cindy, I dont think I have ever felt this good !!!!! Allow yourself to cry and get those feelings out. But dont let yourself dwell on the negatives and what can go wrong. Concentrate on what can go right. And how you can have your life back. You can Do this!!! And we are all here to cheer you on. Love and Hugs, Laura

And how are you doing Laura, you sexy looking momma. You sound so great. I can tell you are becoming so healthy and the weight loss is fantastic. Richard

Thanks guys for the support. I have done so much research, read probably hundreds of profiles including the memorials and I know I want this so badly. You are right Loraine, when the reality of it hits it is very scary. I should explain that although I am 45 yrs old, I have never had a serious medical problem. Never had stitches, an IV, a foley cath, etc. That is what is really scaring me, along with the thought of complications. Even being in a hospital bed will be a new thing. I have always been the care giver. I watched my mother go through countless surgeries and always had horrible things happen, so I know what I could be in for. I lost her two years ago to brain cancer and I miss her support. Ninety percent of the time I am fine with everything, but then in a weak moment I will think about what I have to go through to get to the losing side, and I have a pity party. I admire all the post-ops so much for being strong enough to take such a big step. I want to feel that pride in myself also. Thanks again, CB

Cindy, We all go through these thoughts. I am sure you will do fine. I never had been in a hospital over night before my surgery. I just put myself in my higher powers hands and I felt total calm. Good Luck and GOd Bless, Richard

Cindy, I can definitely relate to your feelings. I considered not following through with the process in the beggining, but going to support groups and listening to the great success stories and watching everyone lose the weight and blossom into beautiful people was enough evidence for me to do it and feel free of fear. I thought......My goodness that could be me a year from now, feeling on top of the world and getting the great sence of satisfaction that I did what was right. To feel healthier and look great, what a rush. Well, I, just like you started the process on April 30, 2005 and I just got my surgery date ( Oct 11 ). I am a little nervous but the excitement of what the outcome will be overides any fear that I have. I can't wait!!!! Next tuesday can't get here fast enough. Maybe visit a few support groups and others can help you feel at ease a little more. Hang in there Cindy! Josie

Hey Cindy: You are almost at the same place I am in my journey. I know exactly how your feeling. I have one visit with my nutritionist on Wednesday then one more after that. I am getting sort of nervous too as the months roll by. I have to go tomorrow to pay for my psych evaluation. Then the last thing I need to do for them is get my Cardio Clearance. That will be ok because I just had a stress test and all that other stuff in the spring. You are not far from me I live in Parma and am having my surgery done threw Norhtern Ohio Bariatrics, they are located in Parma General Hospital.The hospital is about a five minute walk from where Live. Well anyway good luck to you and I will watch for your posting as to how your journey is going. God Bless Denise