PROBLEM WITH THE HUBBY!

Has your husband gone to the information session at your surgeon's office? Sometimes that helps and he will be more informed about what the statistics are for losing and regaining with diet and exercise vs surgery. You really need some positive people about the surgery surrounding you. I think that if your family and/or husband heard what the surgery involves also, maybe he would be more understanding. I am thankful that my husband was understanding. You do need support at home. I just had another thought, how about your family doctor? could he/she talk to your husband? I am assuming that your family doctor is in favor of the surgery. I actually had more than one doctor recommend surgery to me and the first time, my family doctor discussed it with my husband before bringing it up to me (obviously pre-HIPPA) but I believe that it helped my husband be supportive. Please feel free to email me if you need someone to talk to, I am 6 months out and feeling great. chris

Great info Dr. Curry, ladies let me tell you this. My husband was against the surgery 100%, my daughter ( a 27 yr old who worked out daily in the gym)did not speak to me the entire time I worked for my approval, she did not visit me in the hospital nor did she come around me when I was recuperating. I was a very bad diabetic and had lost my kidney due to the complications that I accept were related to the diabetes and a very uncaring urologist who kept treating me like a fat person!! he then released me from the hospital in renal failure..fortunately another urologist agreed to take my case and saved my life..That is when I got pissed and said this is it!! I made up my mind to have the surgery and I didn't care what anyone said or thought..I also made up my mind that I would work the program, be compliant and show them all that I made the right decision..after I lost all my weight I was asked ifI won anyone over..I did of course but I didn't care enough what they thought to ask them, I am happy and healthy today..this is all about ME!!!! For once in my life after caring for two children and husband who had been in a serious auto accident and disabled for years. this was truely all about ME.. My daughter will be at the conference on Saturday selling Kings Island tickets..ask her what she thinks of this surgery now. She is my biggest supporter and gives anyone who is thinking about this surgery my name and number.. My husband is still not a huge supporter because now he never sees me and is sick and tired of hearing about the conference and all the docs I visit and talk to..hmmm a bit jealous of my new life maybe?? I can handle that..lol At this point remember what others say is unimportant..go on through the process find someone within your family who will be a support buddy, if not then find another WLS patient who will be with you through the process, I have done this with a few patients myself. Then get busy after the surgery, be compliant and work hard on new eating habits and exercise..Walk a bit every day if you are having problems because of your weight then walk to the mail box..walk circles on your deck..one day you will find yourself ready for walk around the mall. You will be surprised how people will change their mind about this surgery..but you have to prove it to them!! I am not sure everyone around me agrees that I did the right thing..but ask me today 150 lbs lighter if I give a rats.. See you at the conference!! Brenda

Just my opinion but I think it is extremely difficult to make people who have never had a weight problem understand the trauma that your whole life is. The diets that you tried and failed at, the things that you can't physically do, the times that you feel as though you aren't normal. Years ago my mother and I would be out and if she saw someone who was larger then me, she would say, "Go over there and stand next to that person so I can see what you would look like if you were thin." God rest her soul, but that comment used to cut through me like a hot knife. I agree with Dr. Curry. If the problem of weight could be cured with a pill, would people object? Highly unlikely. After losing over 150 pounds in the past few months, I now know what a life is about. You are the only person who can make this decision. I can now look ahead to the weddings, graduations, and all of those other events that I thought that I would not live to see. I was very fortunate in having my niece support my decision. And glory be, my sister can't brag enough about me now. My sister of all people, when we had always had such a rocky relationship! Life is good on this side of the mountain! Hang in there!