Support

Can anyone tell me if there is a website of any kind for significant others to read? My husband is totally non-supportive of this surgery. I'm self pay and its about the money to him. I'm right at 100lbs overweight and have type II diabetes. He keeps telling me that if I "really" wanted to lose weight I could do it myself. That the surgery is a waste of money because what was it going to do??? only make me eat less, why can't I just do that on my own. My sister had WLS a year ago and she feels and looks wonderful. I have researched and read and read and read, been to support meetings of the Dr. (he went to 1, I've been to 2). I don't know what to do I'm miserable but hate going against him. I don't know why he can't see how much happier and more active I would be . We can afford it (to take out a loan). All he sees is the $$$ signs, not me...at least thats how I feel. Anyone have any advice???? Thanks, Bev

Bev, I am sorry that your husband is not suppporting you. With that said, if you really really want to have this surgery, let nothing stand in your way. I have been denied by my insurance company & I am not in the position to be able to take out a loan right now. I would give anything to be able to have this surgery because I have seen with my own eyes what life saving opportunities it has given people. Your profile only mentions your choice of surgeon but nothing about which type of surgery you are going for. What I would suggest to you, is to find out where local support groups are for your particular procedure & drag your husband along. Trust me, it will help him to see so many others who have had the surgery & how its changed their lives. My mom was not at all recepive to my idea of wanting surgery. It wasn't until I brought her to Dr. Maguire's info session that she came on board. She was not only able to here from the surgeon, she got to see photo albums from 2 of his former patients & listen to their stories. She was also able to ask her own questions & I was able to have them give their 2 cents about how some people just don't understand why a person couldn't do it on their own. Again, my heart goes out to you & I hope that your husband will soon realize that this is something that you need to do for yourself in order to prolong your life & avoid any further co-morbitities from obesity. Good Luck! Jen

Bev, We have an excellent video at our office that is produced by Ethicon and is excellent for spouses to watch. Patients talk about their experiences and one of them is even a physician who had the surgery done. They all talk about how they could not lose the weight any other way and more importantly about the positive impact the surgery has had on their lives. Stop by some time if you want to borrow one. Dr. C The Deaconess Surgical Weight Loss Center Cincinnati, Ohio 513.559.2545

Dr C, Can I get a copy of that? I would like to add it to my video gallery on the website. Thanks, Sandy

We'd have to check with Ethicon to make sure they'll allow it as they own the rights to it. I have it on a video CD so it would be easy. Stop by and pick up a copy some time. Dr. C PS You need a 2 step PPD (TB test, make sure it's a 2 step) before they'll let you in the OR. You need that and proof that you have health insurance

Here is another good site for our support persons to look at. Just put the www in front and your their. gastricbypassfamily.com/GuidingPrinciplesforSO.html My Hubby wasn't set on the ideal when I first told him about WLS. But then I started letting him read for himslef and ask the questions he wanted answered. Here is the link to another support group I belong to. It's in Cincinnati and it is a really great group of people. A lot of the support people come to the meetings. It really helps them to understand that we are not the only ones who have felt this way all our lives, and that they are not the first to not be with us 100% until they also learn. Just put the www in front. wlsbutterflynetwork.org/ We're all here for you. Robin W. 218/135.5/115

hijack-robin you are doing fantastically! had to jump in here to say so! and you give great advice! margo 232/192/120?

Hi Bev.I am so sorry your husband isnt suporting this surgery.In the long run it will save you so much more money then you can even realize.First you wont be getting any junk food and that will save.I am also self pay and I have diabetes .My husband doesnt want to lose me before he is done with me lol.35 years and I am ready to start living again.Let him know how much better your life will be with him,Good luck,let us know and do it for yourself and noone else,Cindy Bring him to meet Dr.Curry and he will change his mind.I am having mine in 11 days.