Don't know how I'm gonna leave my little girl the day of surgery...

It's getting closer to my Lap RNY surgery, and something is bothering me tremendously, how am I going to leave my precious little baby girl the morning of my surgery? She's 14 months old, and she's so very precious to me. We are very close, so I honestly don't know how I will be able to leave her that morning knowing that, well, there's a slight chance I won't see her again . It's not fair to her at all if she loses her mommy all because her mommy couldn't lose the weight on her own. Does/did anyone else feel the same way??

I have two young sons. At the time I had surgery, they were 7 and 3. It was really hard!!! I had my mom bring them up to visit me in the hospital the next day so I could see them and also so they wouldn't be afraid of what was going on. My 7 year old understood what I was in there for, but my baby didn't. He just thinks mommy's tummy was fixed. At 14 months, your daughter isn't going to have a clue what's going on or why you can't pick her up post-op. I was really worried about not coming home to my boys after surgery, but you just have to push those thoughts out of your mind and believe you're doing this for yourself as well as her, to make yourself healthier for both of you!! Hugs and prayers to you, Jessi

Thanks so much for your thoughtful reply. It is so good to know that there is support from people like you on this website to talk to. You're right, somehow I have to push those thoughts out of my mind, because it will drive me crazy during the next couple months. I don't have my surgery date yet, but am expecting to receive it soon. Thanks so much for replying. Rhonda Carter

Rhonda, you have a greater chance of dying in a car crash! Don't let those negative thoughts cloud your mind. You are doing this FOR your daughter, so a year from now you can play in the leaves, and build snowmen. Also, stop thinking that you are a failure at weight loss. There are many factors as to why you may not have lost weight. It is not always because of will power and don't let people tell you different! Keep us informed of your progress. You have a good support system here. By the way, did you get a date yet? Blessing to you, Mary Beth

I HAD to keep thinking "what is it going to be like in 10 years if I don't do this"!! And as kids get older, they can get very mean. I overheard one of the preschoolers telling my son "Your mom has a fat butt". I have been told that as junior high approaches, the kids will get even more cruel. So please just think of how much better things will be afterwards! I had surgery one month ago, and have a 6 year old, 2 year old and my twins are one years old. I think taking care of them, has really made my recovery quicker. Good Luck to you!!

Focus on the positive here. Now is not the time to dwell on any negative. You are going to do just fine and soon you will be jumping and making snow angels and going for walks to see Santa Claus. Think of those things. The surgery is really the easiest part of this whole process.

I have young sons,I had the surgery so I could live a longer life with them.With out it I would have died in 2 years and my sons would have seen me suffer.I also did it for my self.

My kids are 15 and 12, and I worried so much that I made up and will and everything. They were alittle mad at me for that, but you can never be too careful. Just remember, things could happen any time, I told my hubby that there was just as much chance of my getting hit by a bus on my way to work as dying in surgery.(he was not relieved)I know your little angel will not understand but remember, you will not loose time with her in the long run, like I did for not trying to have this earlier. Also, you will not have to worry about dying of weight related issues. You will be able to enjoy her VERY active years, when she wants to spend time with you, and not have all your fun going to the movies because you are to tired to do more active things, because of your weight!!! You will do fine and she will have an even better mom because of it!!!!!! Do you have family around that can take her too? Make this a fun time for her. Find a teen family member of friends child an dhire her as a mothers helper for a little while. Your daughter will have a ball and you can be relieved, and rest. Rhonda, everything will be OK, Good luck and god bless, Janie in Girard open rny 9-3-03