Tons of weight up front or not at all?

I also have a question about weight loss.  Again, a little over 3 months out from RNY. My doc has told me that I am "behind" schedule. I'm not sure what schedule this is, but I guess he has one. Anyway, I am down 54 lbs at the 3 month mark (or 26.6% of excess body fat). Doc says I should be at 53 lbs or 36.6%. After letting me stew about that comment for a second or two, he adds "give or take 10%".  Ok, so I'm not seeing a problem here!! I told him I would be overjoyed at 10-15 lbs a month for a year (that would be more than my goal anyway). He said it doesn't work that way. He said that the surgery is meant to take weight off quickly and then slowly and he implied if I don't lose another 54 lbs by my 6 month appt that I will probably not reach my goal. Anyone having issues like this?

My thinking is this...if I am working out 5 days/week and eating a fraction of what I was before, how the hell can I NOT lose weight? It doesn't make sense to me. And I am really confused and frustrated by the doc's behavior here. I know they think I am cheating or lying because I heard them whispering outside the exam room door at my appt (is that unprofessional or what??).

Sorry to vent, just haven't posted on here in a long time and realized if anyone could help it would be fellow patients. Thanks all!

Some docs have NO BED SIDE MANNER to speak of.  Some want all of their WLS to be a siz 00 when they are done. My doc NEVER gave me a goal to speak of. The charts are for ME ALL  WRONG. I'm 4'10" so I'm about as tall as most kids in GRADE SCHOOL   I'm NEVER gonna be 95lb again.  Plug in your numbers here and see what NORMAL people your age and hight weight.  Now it also gives you other info also which I think is to low for most people.  MY goal is to be on the high side of normal a BMI about 25.
http://www.thinnerself.com/files/calculator.htm

Here's another chart that says I could weight any where from 103-134.  You have to take in FRAME size also.  For me even though I'm short I'm not petite I have hve vey large frame.
http://www.healthchecksystems.com/heightweightchart.htm

Just keep working your program and get to YOUR goal not your docs.
Robin

Robin,

Thanks much for the response.  I checked out both of those links and I think my goal of 200 is ok for now.  Both say normal for me is around 165 (163 top on one, 167 on other).  I, like you, am going for the top side of a healthy BMI.

I do have to start looking at the whole picture in that I will live with myself forever, doc will only be around as long as it takes me to reach my goal or disappoint him into giving me up as a patient! lol

When I look at what I eat now for a meal and what I used to eat (ie, 1C of chili as opposed to 5C poured over an entire sleeve of saltines), there is no comparison and no way I won't keep losing.  One thing I haven't done is monitor calories.  I'm wondering if maybe I am not getting enough? 

Evaluate a day for me......One packet instant Quaker weight control oatmeal for BF, 2-3 oz meat for lunch, 3-4 oz meat & a little veggie for dinner.  Sometimes I'll have an orange or apple with lunch, or a yogurt (tiny six pack size).  I drink at least 64 oz liquid a day (includes a can of V8 and 2 glasses of skim milk).  That's it.  I only eat 3 meals a day.  I also try to exercise after work every day and definately do 3 times a week, no less.  Maybe my body is in starvation mode or something??

When it all comes down to it, my feelings and self-esteem are really what matter and I have to remember that I am doing great!

OH is awesome, sorry I stayed away so long.

Ignore your doctor.  Both of the doctors I went to the information sessions for when I was pre-op said that weight loss would AVERAGE about 10 pound/month for the first year (but that the loss would be much more dramatic during the first 3 months of that year, and much slower the last three months of that year).  It also depends a great deal on how much weight you have to lose to begin with.  There is no "normal" when it comes ot this stuff... everyone's body responds a bit differently.  I, for example, am one of those people who do dump (but it takes a lot to make it happen) but am very sensitive to fat content.

My goal is to get to the very top of "normal", but even my surgeon said that -- again -- there is no normal, and that waht is NORMAL and NATURAL and HEALTHY for me may not match the BMI charts.  I inherited a huge chest and large, muscular (as well as fat-prone) thighs, so I have to take that into consideration.  I'm still hoping to lose those last 10 pounds, but will NOT consider myself a failure if I don't.  My blood sugar levels are normal (they were creeping up towards that dreaded "diabetic" line) and I wear a size 12 or 14, depending... so I am happy.  It's not quite the body I WANTED or HOPED FOR post-op (what I really wanted was 125 pounds, lol!), but it's what I have and it beats the hell out of being 300+ pounds, out of breath, unhappy, struggling with sleep apnea, worried about blood sugar levels, etc.!!!!

Lora

Thank you Lora.  I know that's exactly how I need to think.  And hearing if from fellow patients makes it more sensible then telling myself (if you understand what I mean).  You know "the doctor knows best" and all those things people put in your head.  And I had the fears under control after the first visit, but after this last one I started thinking maybe he was right.  I even questioned if I was still losing weight!  My friends all laughed and asked me what planet I was from!  They said of course I'm losing weight still and that I look good. 

So I am going to take what you both have said and keep it close to my heart!  I won't let the doctor get in my head or heart again!  He isn't God, he's just a friggin surgeon!!!!!!

Hi Martha,

I am just a little confuses... you said you lost 54# in 3 months, but the doctore said you should be at 53#????   I am assuming you meant that number to be higher...

I think 54# in 3 months is great... when else could you lost and kept of 54#???  That loss averages out to 4.5# per week!!! 

Yes most people tend to lose quicker in the first few months, and it will slow down eventually, but your goal is still very attainable!!! 

I think some surgeons have an unrealistic expectation sometimes.. not to say that is totally bad.  However if you say you are following the rules & exercising, they should believe you!!!  I hope you have a support group in your area that  you can get some insight from as well!!! 

Keep up the good work!!!

Caroline

Caroline,

Nope, you read that right.  He said 53 is the avg and I'm at 54 "so you made that, but....." he goes on to say 36.6% of excess weight lost is the avg at 3 months and I am only at 26.6% so "you're a little behind on that"....Then he tells me that % is "give or take 10%".  So, I agree, I am doing fine.  But it seems like no matter what I do it isn't enough.  I am going to try the Summa support group tonight and gigglechat told me about a group in Canton that is good, so I'll try that one next month. 

I am just glad I got my act together and got back on here.  I have gotten more support and encouragement on my two posts in the last 24 hrs then I have gotten during any follow appt with my surgeon.

Thanks all!

Martha:

I agree that is seems as if you are on target.  ( ie  am down 54 lbs at the 3 month mark (or 26.6% of excess body fat). Doc says I should be at 53 lbs or 36.6%. )  If you are doing everything that you are supposed and are not really satisfied with the "service" you are getting from your doctor then I would suggest you find another. 

A friend of mine had the surgery and ended up going through 3 doctors to find one that she really liked. the first one had no bed side manner, the second one accused her of cheating on her bf because she was so pleased with her success.

If you need to chat just contact me here or you can do it privatley at [email protected] feel free