what to do???

Hi all, I havent posted in awhile. Well as some of you know the day I was to go in get the physical and my date I found out that I was pregers (Jan 11th i think) anyway alot more has happened. The discovered I was already in my 2nd trimester and that the baby didn't form a brain. I was 15 weeks when they took her (Feb 1st) we named her Wilma Pearl. I have been now try'n to figure out what to do. My husband and I werent sure if we wanted anymore children and then there she was and we were happy. Now she is gone and we are terrible sad and we believe we want to try. The question is when. I am gonna have a RYN just when is the question. Does anyone know when are you cleared after a thing like this to be able to have the surgery and 2 dont you have to wait like 18 months after the surgery to try to get pregers. I am almost 34 dont want to wait to long to do either, just try'n to figure out the order in which to do them.

I am sp sorry for your loss. You are young and your youngest is very young. Why not wait until your are healthy and try to conceive then. It seems you would be better all around. Just my thoughts.

I know you're probably as committed to the RNY as I am to the band (i'm not banded yet, but hope to be within the next year) but with the band you don't have to wait the 18 months because they can just take your fill out or partly out. just a suggestion. Angela

HI there. sorry for your loss. I know what you are going through.. my son was diagnosed with Anencephaly (which I believe is what your daughter had) I delivered at 19 weeks. They induced me. I dont know how long you have to wait with RNY.. but with the lap band, they would like you to wait until you get to your goal before you get prego.. but there are people on the board that are pregnant 4 months out of surgery. and perfectly healthy children. If you are worried about timing.. you would probably be better with a band. You won't lose weight as fast.. but you can get pregnant sooner. 34 isn't that old anyway.. so I wouldn't worry about it. Sorry about your loss.. Amanda

Hi Linda I am really sorry to hear about all you and your family have gone though. I am not sure when you can be cleared (it would most likely be best to call your surgeon),however I can tell you that all the info I have been given says to wait 18 months before trying to become or becoming pregers.... Kristi

I agree with Nancy, getting healthy should come first so you can enjoy a healthier pregnancy. You are not too old to acomplish this! Be happy and enjoy the journey. Pam

Oh, my thoughts and prayers to you and your family. Sometimes the best things you have to wait for (the surgery) Unfortunately, I don't have any advise about which would be best option for you but I agree that 34 is not old at all (probably b/c I just turned 35 and still like to think that Im young enough to add a child or two more to my family). I completely get and understand your dilema though. There are people who are having babies into their 40's. My girlfriend had the open RYN in October of 2001 and in October of 2003 she found out that she was pregnant with her daughter (the day she was having her tummy tuck. She was at the hospital and they took her blood for some routine checks and she said literally she had the IV in her arm for the surgery and everything and the Dr. told her that she was pregnant and would not do the surgery.) She has since had another child and her tummy tuck and both of the children are extremely healthy. She was 35 with her first and 37 with her second. So it is definatley possible. Everyone makes their own decision regarding their own families so that is something that you and your husband will have to personally consider and decide on. What ever you choose it will be the right desicion for you and your family. Best wishes to you and your family!!! :angel: