I just have to say...

I love these OH boards and all the wonderful people I have met through them. They have been with me through all the ups and downs of my WLS, through my first disappointment when I went in for surgery and woke to find out that they hadn't done it because of other complications, to the joy I felt when I finally got it done 3 weeks later and now through all the ups and downs I'm experiencing throughout this incredible journey. A few months ago I said that if I could find ONE good thing about being overweight my whole life, it was the joy that I have felt at meeting such wonderful, supportive and loving people over the past few months. I probably would have never known that there could be so many selfless and caring people otherwise and we probably would have never had the opportunity to touch one another's lives and for that I am SO grateful. The one thing that disappoints me though, is seeing that there are people out there who prey on the weaknesses of those of us who have been overweight and struggled with self esteem for so long. I find it really sad and totally inexcusable that someone would use these boards that are here for support and encouragement to fill their own selfish needs and try to make up for other shortcomings in their lives by playing mind games, especially when they too have suffered the pain of obesity, so I particularly want to warn all the wonderful women out there, to be careful. For the most part, I have made some wonderful male friends (in addition to all the wonderful female friends!) throughout this WLS journey, so it really burns me to see that there are one or two out there who think this is an opportunity to build up their egos by preying on vulnerable women on the message boards. Luckily for me, I'm not that naive and the one thing that has come from my journey is that my self esteem has been growing by the day, but we all know how easy it is to be taken in by a little flattery when you need it the most (and not see the writing on the wall), so just keep that in mind and be on your guard! HUGS, Vi

I guess I'm missing it. I see some real sweet men on the boards who seem really sincere. Maybe I'm naive. Linda

No, there's tons of really sweet men, for certain! So be glad you haven't met the few insincere predators ! Vi

Hi Vi - amen, my friend! It is sad that there is anyone on these boards who looks to take advantage of a fellow member! I too have met at least one person who is a "player" and not the person I thought he was when answering a post he had written. I agree that I have met some incredible people on this journey, people I never would have met if had not had this surgery and had the sense to join this board and that includes YOU! But we are all vulnerable and we need to be careful. And we have to remember that this is an open board and anyone can join. We have to hope that the people here are really who they say they are, looking for the support we all need and offer to each other. Thanks for posting such a poignant message and for speaking out. Robin

Thanks Robin for your support, you have been a great friend to me! HUGS, Vi

Hi Vi, I hope that you turn in the "a.." holes to OH and let them know that the creeps are using members emails to post their trash. Also, if you wanted to you could give us all their email addresses so we could also delete any messages that they may send to anyone else. Thank you for your "heads up!" Sometimes we don't realize that the messageboards are so public. LindaM

That's a good suggestion. I wish I had thought about it, I will do that. Thanks Linda!

Violet, Hun I am sorry that you have had to post this and I am with you 100%.....I have sent you an email ~Hugs~ Debra P

Thanks hon and I sent a reply! HUGS, Vi

Hi Vi, What wonderful things you have to say! I think you are fabulous! Can you email me and let me know who these a-holes are that you are taking about? I think I know who...thanks so much! Tavia