should i tell people about the surgery?

I have had weiht problems all of my life and have always been told that it's because I don't have enough will power. Ok, maybe I don't.......but that's why I want this sugery.....it will be a wonderful tool!! I want energy...I don't want to be sore....But so many people I know think of it as a cop out Somehow I am really excited about this whole thing and the other part of me is ashamed that it's come to this. And I guess that what it boils down to....that's i'm ashamed and don't want people to know I'm having it? But people are going to notice the weight loss and I will be out of work for two weeks..... I have high moral values and I don't want to lie about it either.....What should I do? What have some of you done??

Dee Dee, Before I had the surgery I told my family and friends. I told my co-workers in my immediate department. After the surgery, I told those I was comfortable with. If somebody with a weight problem asked me how I lost weight, I usually told them I had gastric bypass surgery. I didn't want to mislead somebody into thinking I found some kind of miracle diet. Best of luck to you. I know your surgery goes well and you have a speedy recovery. Mary 302/191/1??

PREOP i only told my immediate family and my work clients. I didnt want my clients to think i had a terrible illness needing to close for 2 weeks, seeing me go to all the pre op doctors for my surgical clearance...so i told them. NOW i only come forward if someone asks how i lost my weight. I am very active in my surgeons support groups and the obesityhelp chapter that meets in my area so i have made some very great acquaintances who had the surgery and truly know this is not an EASY fix to our weight issues. MY immediate family my dad and step mom didnt like my choice but didnt stop me from going forward with it. THEY were miss informed and I had full confidence in the surgeon i choose to perform my surgery. I wouldnt worry about things and just take it one day at a time. TELL whom you feel you want to and let the rest fall into place. GOOD LUCK BE WELL and enjoy your journey! LISA 310/209/???

Dee, I have to say that I told everyone that would listen to me. but that is just me, I was proud and still am of what I chose to do to take back my life, that I wanted to tell everyone. Some offer support and some say it is the easy way out but chalk that up too ignorance and nothing more. You have to do what is right for you hun as we all had/have to do. I wish you the very best ~hugs~ Post often and let us know how you are doing. Debra P 285/207/125??

HI Dee Dee, I told my family--the ones *****ally care about me--and a few close friends. To Other people I just said as little as possible. I did tell those who matter that the surgery is NOT a cop out!!! The lifestyle after surgery is far more difficult than --just having a little"will Power" . In order to stay healthy , you will have to eat a very strict diet, take vitamins and minerals regularly--without fail, exercise. and most of all You will need emotional stability! Remember --you are giving up one of your closest friends--Food (sweets that is). You have nothing to be ashamed of--anyone who thinks that you are taking the easy way out, needs to know that this is a serious operation and a difficult lifestyle to maintain--and that you have chosen this route in order to be healthy and to live a longer and a better life. You have to choose who, and what, you will tell to people--no I would not mis lead them--but I don't necessarily have to shout it from the roof tops either. I am older than you--so I Have several health problems--I told most acquaintances that I was having surgery for my knees and my oteoporosis( not a lie--When I lose weight --my bones will stop fracturing so easily and my arthritic knees won't ache as much) You tell the people that count in your life. They are the ones who NEED to know! Be Blessed Marian S.C.

Hi Dee Dee, I'm having surgery on Nov 7. So far I've only told 2 sisters and 3 very close friends, two of whom I work with. These are who I trust explicitely and are also willing to help me as much as possible. I'm not telling the rest of my family until afterwards. Sure, they will notice the weight loss but to most of the family I lose weight and gain all the time. The "fat" gene in the family. The surprise will be that I will keep it off. Another reason I chose to have surgery out of my home area was because of family. Most dwell on the negative and I don't need that or want that right now. The surgery is for my health and was a personal choice that was easy to make after being overweight most of my life as well. Once it's done I'll tell anyone who asks and if there are comments, oh well, I still get healthy regardless of what anyone says. I personally feel very good about my decision to keep it quiet. You may have some extra soul searching to do but in the end, support is very important up to and including for the surgery date. Best of luck in whatever you choose to do. It will be the right decision as long as you make it after weighing the pros and cons. We can be discreet without lying. "Did you have weight loss surgery?" --response,"I'm just working hard to get myself healthy - care to take a walk with me?"

I told everyone in town. Well okay - maybe not everyone in town, but everyone who would listen. I still do - if my experience can help save one life, I'm all for shooting off my big mouth!

I told everyone in town. Well okay - maybe not everyone in town, but everyone who would listen. I still do - if my experience can help save one life, I'm all for shooting off my big mouth!

Thank you all so much for your replies!! They mean alot to me and have given more to think about....THANK YOU DeeDee