I am really scare!!!

I am schedule for surgery on May 6, 2005, and I am really scare. Looking for any excuse to cancel the entire process. Before I was afraid of the discomfort and pain after the surgery but now is more afraid of dying during the surgery. I have met a few people at my office that have been thru the surgery, but they are really private about the entire process. I don't want to live my life like this because I have a 2.5 very active little boy that needs his mommy and plus it is emotionally and physically painful being obese.

for me i was afraid of the way i was living i used to sit on my chair during my sons football games and watch today i run down the sidelines with the running back..... wooooo hoooooo life is grand i now have no more knee pain Stacy

I am also scared. First it was the scar- I most likely have to have it open, then leaking, then DYING- on the table. I am probably going to do it end of May- LAst year I was approved and got an ulcer! I was happpy to have an excuse. HOWEVER- your fears are common. I know a lot about fear, decision making and behavior. I am a Dr of psychology- a psychologist! Here I am trying to cope! We play out scenarios in our head of possible ways the surgey will affect us, some are postive (being thin, buying new clothing, health improvements..) and then some are negative (scars, puking, and the worse...) This is human nature. How do you cope? Make sure you are the healthiest you can be before hand. The tests you have to take are attempts to rule out problems before they begin! Now think about all the thousands of posts here from people who did just fine with WLS. Now make sure you find successful and good WLS support. Listen to them, their fears, their stories. Thay is what I am doing now- immersing myself in the group, the message board etc. The more postive I can find the easier it is. I am so ready but do have moments. I then go on line, review my FAT life and all the problems it has caused, fantasze as a thinner person... Our fat will kill us as BONEY C. just said. TRY these excercises- concentrate on the positive. Build on the positive by NETWORKING and SUPPORT of others - use this site- read profiles- listen to their fears, their success- get inspired. I am doing this now! Know that you are distorting the negative - it is human nature. DH

Karen I think what you are feeling is normal, I wish I could tell you I was scared but I wasn't scared to have the surgery I was scared not to have the surgery....I knew my activities were very limited and would only get worse,,,,I knew I would die early if I didn't have this surgery.....I am glad I had surgery and would do it again in a heart beat.....I had a harder time with the insurance company instead of the surgery itself.... I wish you the best through out your journey to a healthier and happier lifestyle.... Christine

First of all I wan to thank all these wondeful people that have replied. I can feel the support and I feel a little more at ease.... but there is a lot more I would like to know......! I was afraid of the discomfort at the beginning, since I had a c-section and the recovery was hell. The pain was tolerable because of the drugs, but it was really hard to move around. At this point I am over that, I am so tired of feeling tired and in pain all the time. I live in one of the best cities in the world and I can't enjoy it. I don't take my son to the playground because I can't chase after him, plus I don't want for him to be teased at school because mommy is fat. I was teased as a child and most of the time I wish I was dead. But now my biggest fear is not waking up from the surgery, dying and not being there at all for my son. Now my question is what is the process the day of the surgery, before and after the surgery? How many hours later you wake up? Can you walk the same day? would you be hungry after you wake? Do they feed you that day and what? I am asking because when I got my c-section I was hungry for over 24 hours. I hope you don't feel uncomfortable and thank you so much for your response.

Hi Karen, I am just over a month out so everything is still fresh for me. I had the open procedure. The day of surgery I got there 2 hours early, was taken almost immediately. I sat there with the hospital gown on and my family came and sat with me. There the nurses asked basic questions and I received a heparin shot (blood thinner). Then they had my family leave and took me to the pre op area. There I was swarmed with several nurses and anesthesiologists. More questions, and an IV started. This is when I got really scared. I just talked to God and I felt better. Once the IV was in and my doctor arrived, they gave me meds that calmed me. Once in the OR my doctor said are you ready to start your new life and that was all I remember. Once in the recovery room I woke up and was in pain and nauseous. The nurses were wonderful and gave me meds through my IV for both. I slept and they woke me when it was time to go to my room. My family was there waiting on me. One thing to remember is that medicine hits everyone differently. Some sleep, others like me just get hyper. I walked the same day. Acctually once they put me in the bed and left the room I got up and sat in the recliner. I pretty much stayed there until I left the hopital. I hated the bed. I did walk often. I had surgery on Friday and went home on Sunday. My surgery took 45 minutes. From the time I left my family and then saw them again was about 2 hours. The first day I only had Ice chips. The next day I started clear liquids. I have never been hungry. Just thirsty. If you have any other questions feel free to email me at [email protected]. Every surgeon, hospital, staff and patient are different. I will pray that God guids your surgeon's hands and that you have a speedy recovery. Best Wishes, Loretta

I am very happy you e-mail me, I went in to your profile and I see we share the same fears. I started crying while I was reading it, because it felt like I had written it myself. I don't care if I get stuck in 200lb I just want out of the 358lb I am right now. Today I went out with my 2 year old and stroller of course, to have my cellphone fixed and then we went to see the Pacifier with Vin Disiel and right now everything hurts. When I stand I feel this horrible pain on my feet. My entire body aches, I am taking some Tylenol and going to bed. Please keep me posted and ad some picks to your profile.