Finally made the call

Well today I made the call. I called to schedule my first meeting with Dr. Cole out of Elmira. I see him 2-16-05. I have been reading the boards and doing the research. I have a couple of questions. Has anyone been seen by Dr. Robert Cole. Also how do you comfort family members with this choice that I am making. I know this is the right choice for me. I am 32, I am been overweight since after High School. My wife and I want to start a family and I want to be around to see them grow up. I want to play with them and chase after them. I'm sure I will have more questions after my first meeting. Thanks for any help you can give me

Congratulations, you are on your way!! As for family members, you don't make them comfortable I pretty much said I am doing this for me and that was the end of the story. I remarkably got a lot of support, I was prepared for the worst but that was how I presented it and it worked! I have two kids and have lost 50 pounds already and it really does make a difference. You are doing the right thing. Do your research, ask questions and come here and read read read!!! Good Luck Tina

I didnt tell anyne except my husband and my oldest daughter. Then about a week before, I told my mother in law. She was real happy for me. I told my other kids the day before. I just said that I didnt want anyone to worry needlessly till my surgery date. The fact of it was...I wasnt interested in anyone elses opinion. I didnt want any negative feedback. This was the decision I made, and I felt it was right for me. Afterwards, when I told everyone, they were pretty much for it. My mother in law says that if she were younger (shes 79) she would do it in a heartbeat! Only one I havent heard from is my sister in law (who is negative about everything) and I really dont care what SHE thinks! LOL Just follow your heart on this John. And remember, this is for YOU not everyone else. Best of luck on your journey! Joanna

Thank you Joanna & Tina for your support. I will keep you updated John

Hi John and Welcome to the NY Board!!! Congratulations for taking the first steps in your journey for a much healthier and happier lifestyle. This is a time in your life where YOU come first and family members will either support you or not......hopefully they will come around. Many of us do not tell anyone we are having WLS until a few days before our date, or even after we have surgery. You need to do as much research and stay positive. Find out if your dr has Support Group Meeting and go to as many as you can. Take your wife with you as this surgery will affect her as well. Below is a link of patients of your dr. http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/forums/index.phtml?ID=TR-k142 You will find a lot of support here at AMOS...we all share something special that even our family and friends find it hard to understand! Below is a list of questions for you. Good Luck on the 16th....post and let us know how it went!! Questions to ask your surgeon: ~~~ How many surgeries have you performed? ~~~ Success rate? ~~~ What type of surgery is best for me...VBG...RNY (Gastric Bypass) Distal or Proximal ~~~ Why do you suggest this type for me? ~~~ Do you staple or suture the stomach? ~~~ How can I prepare for surgery...Mentally... Physically!! ~~~ What are your Special instructions 2 - 3 days before surgery? ~~~ How soon can we schedule surgery?... Can I choose a specific date? ~~~ Does the hospital allow my husband to spend the night? ~~~ Does the hospital have a Weight Loss Surgery Ward? ~~~ How long will I be in surgery? ~~~ Do you visit my loved ones after the surgery to tell them how it went? ~~~ Reasons the surgery may not happen after you open me? ~~~ How long is the average recovery time for...open...lap surgery ~~~ How soon can I...Shower...Do Water aerobics...Exercise...Have Sex...Drive a car? ~~~ What types of pain management do you provide...at the hospital...at home? ~~~ How many follow up appointments will I have? ~~~ Do You have support group meetings? If not....where do you send your patients as they are very important to attend....Before and After surgery! ~~~ Will I have an opportunity to meet with the anesthesiologist before surgery? ~~~ Does he/she have experience with heavier people? ~~~ Will I be on a ventilator? ~~~ Will I have a tube down my nose or throat, when I wake up? ~~~ Will I need a catheter? ~~~ Will I have drainage tubes in my incision...how many...for how long? ~~~ How long will I stay in the hospital...barring NO complications? ~~~ Do you suggest that I wear a binder? ~~~ Will I be experiencing hair loss....if so, what do you suggest I do. ~~~ What do you recommend to avoid vitamin deficiencies? ~~~ How many grams of protein do you recommend daily? ~~~ What do you recommend regarding the amount of sugar per food item? ~~~ How common is vomiting?...how can I try to avoid it? ~~~ What is your Food Plan for the first few months post op? ~~~ How does the insurance billing work? ~~~ What MEDS will I have to advoid after WLS...Why...Is this temporary or permanent? ~~~ What else will I need to avoid? ~~~Do you have a list of everything printed up, so I can take it home today and make sure I understand everything? ~~~Do you have a doctor on call 24 hours, in case I need to have a question answered after WLS? Alice

Hi John and welcome to the AMOS FAMILY If you want and I can be of any help let me know and if you need any thing answered or to talk to someone that has been there done that or any family member I will. Also click on the WWW at the botom of my post and you can see how I have changed in pictures or read my profile and see if that helps you or family members out any, just remember that you are doing this for a new life and it is a life change for sure and for me it was for the better. Good Luck Tony

Hi Tony~~ I took a look and WhoooHooo.....it's totally amazing the change in You!! Sometimes it's hard to put into words what we feel.....that is why I TELL EVERYONE to take those PICTURES!!!! Even though we hate to have pictures taken BEFORE surgery, they become a big part of who we were!! It takes awhile for our mind to catch up to our fast shrinking bodies. Eveyone should take a look at your pics and profile.....you are such an inspiration to us......not to mention how GREAT you look!!! This really is a big life change and a much healthier one.........Life Is Grand After WLS!!!!! Enjoy the day Tony!!!

Thanks Alice for saying such kind words to me about my pictures and how I have changed, I look at that before picture taken New Years 2003 and DIE but then look at the New Years 2005 picture taken in the same spot and just SMILE. I am going on two years out next month and LOVE life so much more now and am so happy I did this and if I can help just one person make up there mind that this surgery is a life saver then I would feel so good that I have did my part. Hugs Alice and someday hope to give you that HUG in person Tony

{{{HUG}}} {{{HUG}}}

I just want to say thank you to everyone who has left such nice words. It's nice to know I can look for support here. Tony I will be in contact with you. Thanks again everyone John