3 mons post op. and emotions

Hi Everyone... I am writing out of concern for my spouse. He is 3 months post op. and since surgery he has been on an emotional roll-a-coaster. One minute he's fine and the next he's going a little batty on us. I've done so much research on being the spouse of a gastric bypass patient and nothing has indicated that this type of behavior would be so obvious. Any suggestions on what I can be doing or better yet has anyone ever gone through this and found some solution??? My husband as wonderful and fantastic as he WAS and still can be is starting to get a little unbearable. ANY HELP would be greatful appreciated. As always...THANKS

I have to say from my own experience the first year my emotions were all over ups downs, out bursts, anger, DEPRESSION! IT has to do with the hormones released as we rapidly loose weight. BUT it normal! JUST be strong and be there for him. I know for me i just could not understand why i was so esastic that i was dropping so much weight and looking soo good. BUT i was emotionally a wreck. ITS normal! NOT sure if this helps but im sure he isnt understanding it. hugs hang in their i know for me it all settled down when the weight stopped flying off! ALl the best

This is so very COMMONI cannot believe it wasn't run across! Many things can be happening.. First and foremost the loss of food is a grief reaction, this can evokes STRONG emotions once someone has lost their *addictve substance* so to speak, they can no longer numb/avoid/soothe self in the way that worked best. This is a tremendous loss many do not anticipate. The raw emotions they covered up all their lives are back w/ a vengence and they being out of control have no mechanism to control it! Secondly this is a time of rapid wt loss for many that can be +++ But scary as well the body has many hormonal changes w/ estrogen being released from fat stores, it can be like a bad case of PMS! Really men and women. This is also a time the body shuts down in starvation knowing it may be a famine going on so all things slow down in preparation to save energy, this can add to crankiness, depression, fatigue... If there is any underlying depression untreated preop or even treated it can return w/ a vengence! Or other psychiatric conditions can be unmasked now as well (we see this all the time in recovering alcoholics! Take away thier medication u see the true self!) I tell my patients to consider remainig on their antidepressants ATLEAST the first yr preop (so many feel all their problems are wt related and will go away agter surgery) I am here to say for many they have MORE issues postop, and sadly realize the wt was a symptom NOT the cause for many issues! Encourage direct communication between the 2 of you.. perhaps couples couonseling so ucan both understand the other and make a good marriage better. Divorce is common w WLS as well so keep that in mind....(Divorce is common period today!) Perhaps encourage him for an eval for meds, they arent a cure or magic but may help.. Be well! Take Care, Jamie Ellis RN MS NPP 100cm proximal Lap RNY 10/9/02 Dr. Singh Albany, NY 320(preop)/163 (lowest)/174 (current) 5'9'' (lost 45# before surgery) Plastics 6/9/04 & 11/11/2005 Dr. King www.albanyplasticsurgeons.com http://www.obesityhelp.com/member/jamiecatlady5/ "Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect, it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections!"