Oh well.

Sigh, I feel like I am going around and around on a carousel with this surgery and I can't get off. I have not been feeling so hot. I really did think I would get better all the way by now. I just get so nauseous that I start to gag and foam. It's like my GI tract is malfunctioning and everything just moves so slooow. I had my third paralytic ileus, which is a non-mechancial bowel obstruction, that landed me in the hospital.(You dont want to know what they had to do to get the poo out of me, ew. At least I didn't didnt take another surgery) I mean, I threw up fecal matter all over the ER doctors arms, that is my life. I was screaming like a crazy person when my doctor was trying to pass an NG tube down, it was horrible. I left nail marks on his arm for goodness sake. The CT-scan and upper GI/small bowel follow through both showed that I hardly have any paralysis in my bowels. I started again taking Zelnorm and Reglan to help everything empty but all they seem to do is make me dizzy, shakey and sleepy. We are all starting to wonder if my body just functionally has taken really bad to the bypass. I think the best thing right now is to go back on the TPN so my weight wont get dangerously low again. That stinks in itself b/c its like put a plug in, take one out, put another plug in, take another one out over and over again. Maybe oh maybe things will start moving again after the I go back on TPN. I guess one good thing I can look at is both my initial surgeon and second opinion surgeon are both very supportive and helpful and know it isn't in my head and/or a behavioral problem. The second opinion surgeon gave me the name of this GI doctor at nyu who is very understanding and helpful so far. He also didnt call me a gastric bypass disaster like the other one. I am beginning to think I am one of the lucky choosen few where this surgery ruins their life instead of making it better. Lord knows I have been more than hopeful and positive in trying to make this work but I cant go on like this forever and ever. Yes I lost all the weight, wear a size 0, but who cares, not me. I did this surgery to become healthy, not sick. I dont know what to freakin do but all I know is I am beyond frustrated and feel like donkey diarrhea. I just didn't know how much crap I took for granted until it was ripped away from me. It's like my stupid guts have completely taken over my life. Sorry this is such a downer post but what can you do.

For the love of god I wish there was something I could do anything? This totally and completely sux for you! Your such a beautiful woman and it is not fair. But as you know there is nothing I can do but continue to pray for you to finally beat this thing! I do love you and will always pray for you! Now damn it don't give it up you need to beat this and we are all with you. All my love and support! Hey Can I buy you a latte at star bucks? I will be in the city again next week? Kenny

My Heart is with you as well as my prayres Tavia if there is something i can do to help I live in Nassau IM HERE

Thanks everyone. Your support means a lot! Take care.

Tavia (((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))) and lots and lots of prayers for you! I cannot believe your post. VERY SCARY Thinking of you, Britt

Tavia, you sweet girl, My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family for all you have been having to deal with. It really hit me when you said you did this to be healthy and now loo****rtainly did this (lap band) to be healthy not skinny as well.I know it looks bad Tavia,you have been through so so much but there are a lot of people out here who care for you and I believe if we all pray daily this could change.We are on your side that I assure you. I am not a Holy roller type person but I strongly believe in the power of prayer.So come on OH lets all give Tavia are prayers.I will be happy to start it. Best of luck my friend, Hang in there, Tina

Tavia you know i love you and feel like you are family here and this just kills me. I so wish as a friend, as a nurse as something that i could do or say something to help you. You have been such an inspiration to me and my family. You are the most giving caring person i have ever met. You put everyone elses needs before your own. You are a strong woman and i wish i could be more like you every day. You just hang in there. I am praying for you every day. Something has to give here. ITs not fair that you go through all of this. You are allowed to be mad, frustrated and upset. Just keep venting and never give up. GO to as many docs as you have to because you are worth the fight .....I am here for you although i dont see you much i am here for you. Love Ya LisaMarie

(((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))))))))) were for here for any and all your supportive needs. I dont know what else to say right now. LOVE YA!

Tavia, Hun I am not sure what to say but you have every right to post and if this is a "downer" post as you say that IS OK!!!! This is a place to vent frustrations, laugh, cry or just say hello so you are in the right place. We love you very much and will ALWAYS be here for you!!! I wish I knew just what to say or do to make this crap go away for you! I know this surgery was meant to be a saving grace and yes you lost the weight but now you are suffering in a different way and that upsets us! I was so happy that things were looking up for you and now this news. Please if you need anything (chat, talk or cry) please call me hun! I will email you with my new numbers (not sure if you have them or not) and if you feel like chatting know I am always here for you! Together with the support of your family and your OH family you WILL get through this and it WILL be ok! love ya Debra P

I am sorry you are still suffering Tavia. Hugs, Amy