Wow, life is sure crazy sometimes, ain't it? But you know, as hard as it is right now, you KNOW that it will get better in time. without these valleys, how could we appreciate the mountain tops? I know, not what you wanna hear right now but the fact is that we have to go thru this stuff to learn lessons to prevent us from remaking the same mistakes in the future. At least the surgery wasn't put off indefinately, that's a blessing.........and your wife was able to get the disability so that's a blessing. yeah, it sucks living with one's parents but thank God you had them to go to for help. So while I know it's hard right now, it will get better I have learned that when my life gets tough? it's cuz I'm supposed to learn something. I'm kinda thick headed though, takes me years sometimes to learn a lesson......sigh Carol J

Hello, wow a rough year but it has to go up from here on out. You are strong and in a few years you will look back at the year 2007 and say I am glad we came through that year. Life is like a roller coaster and you are right now at the bottom of the hill eyes focused at climbing up that next hill. June will be here before you now it and you will be feeling great after surgery and your life will improve with better health. And how exciting to be a new dad in SEpt. Congradulations. You have sooo much to look forward to. It might be hard living with parents for now but also a blessing because they are there to help you both out. Things will look up. Last year was our bad year so I understand how you are feeling but now things are great so just take it one day at a time, hang in there Kelly

Hey Shelly I see this board is kinda slow if you will take this question and post it on the Tennessee board the ladies there stay on top of everything and will help you rather quickly. Good luck Dan P.S. just tell them I sent you they like me.

For a very brief time, I actually thought that things were starting to go my way. My wife was feeling better and her bleeding had all but stopped. We learned of a local program that helps people get into a home of their own, and they seemed excited to help us. I was doing well in school and had aspirations of finally finding work in a career. My surgery was still a little ways off, and other than struggling to loose weight, I am right on track. What a glorious week that was. I remembered what it was to be happy and full of hope. Then as I should have expected, but didn't, Life kicked me between the legs... again... It all started with a phone call about 7:00 pm Last Thursday. It was my wife's Doctor and he was worried because her amniotic fluid was low. His concern is that the subchorionic hemorrhage had blocked some nutrient from reaching the baby. My wife is now on limited activity (again), but has also been placed on disability, because the doctor does not want her to work. Next to call was the housing people, who told us we didn't qualify for low income help because we couldn't qualify for $140,000 mortgage. If we could qualify for a mortgage like that we wouldn't need their help!!! My current job ends in a few weeks, and the only interview I have is for a internship making a whopping $7.00 an hour... What will I do with all the money? Then Dr. Blackstone's office calls and tells me my surgery (already rescheduled 3 times) is being rescheduled again! At least it was a short move, from June 8th to June 25th. So basically, I have to continue to live with my parents (My wife and I had to move in with them last April when I was layed off), have zero career options open at the moment, and after paying insurance premiums, will have little money left to work with. I have not been considered seriously for any "real" jobs due partly to my necessary time off for surgery in a few months, but mostly because of my obese body. I keep telling myself that after the surgery things are going to look up. I will feel better, and be more competitive in the job market. I will be a Healthier Dad to my first child (Due in September) and with a little luck and a lot of work, Life will be better. Am I deluding myself?

Do you mean in person or on an online group? If you mean in real life, then I would go about finding a place that is centrally located in your area, so that it's easy to find, etc........decide on how often you want to meet and arrange with a school, church, hospital, etc to hold your meetings there. Then I would make up flyers and give them out to doctor's offices, grocey stores, etc....anywhere there might be folks who would be interested. And I would also ask a couple of friends to help facilitate the meetings so that it doesn't fall onto just your shoulders. We have a local group up here in Albuq and we have several folks who facilitate meetings, plan them etc. We generally average 60 folks or so at the twice monthly meetings but they originally started it in UNM as I understand it back in 2001. We are just a grass roots type of group and we have people who have had different types of surgeries, they all use different surgeons, etc.......so it's a very good group I think We have a structure that we follow and we arrange for speakers at least once a month when we can get them. You might come up for a meeting sometime to get ideas on creating one yourself down there in Las Cruces Good luck, I think it is very much needed down your way Also the Bariatric Advantage folks have someone who will come speak, bring samples and information to a meeting once you get it started, but she may have some ideas for you too, just go to their website and check them out Carol j