lost my mother

I know that I do not pos there often.  I am usually on the vet board or on my own surgeons board.  I lost mother who was 53 on Saturday to lung cancer.

I lost about 10 pounds during the whole process and I am tyring to put it back on, however, I have no desire to eat.  i have nto had time to exercise due to all the planning and all.

I know that I need to take care of myself but its just so hard.

Any words of advice on how to get back to normalcy after her services would be very helpful.  I know that I weill never be the same but I need to get some normalcy back.

First of all let me say Im very sorry to hear about your mother. I lost my mother to cancer also and she was in her 50's.  Its no easy task to move on from.  You will miss dearly but it will get easier with time. 

As far as getting back on track, I would try the protein shake thing.  Its easier to choke down a shake then it is a meal when you arne't feeling yourself.  If you need to have 2 or 3 a day then I say do it.  Add some extra's to them if you have to to beef up the calories. 

If you have a support group where you are I would reccomend hitting one or two.  We have our PRH groups for post ops on the 2nd monday of each month, and anyone is welcome. 

Good luck to you, Your OH family is here if you need us!

K8

Oh Nicole I am so sorry to hear this... My love is with you and your family during this time.

 I'm so sorry for your loss Nicole.  My only advice is that you need to make sure you take time for yourself and let yourself grieve.

Hi Nicole,

I am so sorry to hear about your mom.  I lost mine about 10 years ago, and sometimes I still miss her terribly. 

Just remember to try and eat something good for you with every meal.  Irishfiregirl was right, you will have more luck with shakes and protein drinks.  Just remember to take your time getting back into the swing of things.  You need time to mourn, and sometimes everything hits you later on when you are not expecting it.  Take time for yourself, your family, and just do the best you can.

Remember talking is sometimes the best medicine, so talk to us, your friends, your doctor...anyone.

Take care of yourself.

thank you all....her wake was tonight and she will be cremated!!  I am trying to take care of myself too

Hi Hon,

I was so proud of you tonight. You are an amazing woman and I know that you get that from your Mom. She is smiling down on you with pride at the woman you became and the wonderful Mom you are, all due to her. She wouldn't want you to make your self sick so try to get some extra shakes down, maybe add a few protein bars to your day, easy to get down and no planning...Call me if you need me or if you just want to talk...

((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))))

Oh and if you don't want to travel to Manchester tomorrow, you know you are ALWAYS welcome at our little group....
Now go snuggle with Izzy and get some rest.....

I am so sorry for you loss.
My advice (granted I am pre-op) would be to take care of your mind and well being and then when you are ready go back to concentrating on weight loss and taking care of your body.

My sincerest sympathy to you on the loss of your mom.  I hope she didn't have to suffer too much.  I wish I could offer some advice on finding that normalcy again, but I think it will just take time.  You just have to keep moving forward as best you can.  We are always here for you - just know that.

Hi Nicole,
My heart goes out to you.  It is never easy to lose someone we love but especially around the holidays it is difficult.

As someone who has lost both a parent and a spouse----I can tell you that right now you must simply take things one day at a time.  Time heals---but it is a slow process.  It is hard....and right now it probably takes effort just to breath and then one day you get up and it isn't so hard....

So today, just today....do a few good things for YOU---