had a bad day/everyone is talking about you

Today I am getting REALLY tierd of comments. 

I told nobody about my surgery.  I said "I was sick.  I needed an operation. Now I'm all about getting me healthy".  And I left it there, and that waas only to people who I HAD to say something to because I needed some time off from my usual activities for recovery. 

But for people who just see me in passing, like people who live in my neighborhood but who I only exchange a dog walking smile, whose names I don't know - the secretary at my child's school - the old lady who goes to my church but I've never spoken with.  All of a sudden people are looking at me VERY CONCERNED.  If someone comes up to me and says "Are you feeling okay?" and I say "Yes, thanks, I'm fine" and they let it go at that, then that's great.  I'm fine with that.  But just starring at me with the worry-face or giving me pitying looks, it's just getting really, really old.

So yesterday someone I REALLY don't like anyway comes up to me and says "We all know about you.  We know you weren't really sick.  We know what you did.  You disgust me!!!  And EVERYONE is talking about you.  Your a real scource of gossip around here."

Uh huh.  Yeah.  Thanks.  I *really* needed that.  My husband was sweet and reassuring, saying "Well, you can't trust her and you knew that's why you didn't tell anyone anything.  Especially her." but still, it's completely ruined my day - yesterday and today. 

You know what?  I was sick.  I needed this surgery.  I had co-morbidities.  And I don't see it as anyone else's business.  I didn't ask anyone for anything.  I didn't whine, I didn't ask for help, I didn't accept any help in my recovery from anyone.  I NEVER had anyone drive my kids somewhere, bring my family of six a meal or cover any of my responsibilities for me. 

And I'm not sure if I'm sharing this for spite or to give you further insight into her motives but she's MO and in the last year alone she's done Weigh****chers, Jenny Craig, all that stuff.  So she's obviously not content with herself as is.  Which I'm sure plays a part in her reaction. 

Sorry that happened to you Umber.  That lady must have extremely low self esteem.  People do that when they feel bad about themself.  You don't have to defend your surgery.  It's no one's business but yours.  Try not to be too upset about it.  That comment she made was more about herself than you, I bet.  As you said, it doesn't seem as though her diet attempts are working.  She must be frustrated w/herself.  It's still mean to be like that though.  And the people looking at you all concerned, tell them to shove it.  It's not worth any stress on you.  You did what you NEEDED to do to live a healthy, longer life!  Hang in there!

Lisa

Some people are just nuts.  This is one of those situations where you have to stick it in a folder and file it in your head under "People who are nuts" and just leave it at that.

It sucks that people can't be supportive--  or at least remember what Thumper said (in "Bambi"):  If you can't say nuffin nice, don't say nuffin' at all.

You should definately not let this person get under your skin....I know easier said than done!!  But do you really know that everyone "knows about you".  It could be she is looking to stir things up.  It is obvious that she does not have anything better to do.  Sometimes it would be great if peopled minded their own business, but unfortunately we live in the real world where people, young and old, are just mean. 

Be proud of yourself....you should be.  At least you were able to see outside of yourself, and get healthy. 

Holly, I am truly sorry this happened to you.     I haven`t had this experience with my surgery , BUT I have had some so called aquaintences of mine years ago gossip all sorts of lies about me.               I tried to take it from where it came ( unhappy women) but it still hurt.              I think you hit the nail on the head and this woman is unhappy and probably very jealous of you.        When I saw /met you you I was like WOW!!!                  You are gorgeous and so tiny!!!        You have a beautiful smile and I will bet you any amount of $$$ this woman is green with envy.


I know knowing her motives or guessing at them doesn`t make you feel better and I am truly sorry she had to open her MO MOUTH!!!!

JEN

You guys are so sweet.  You really helped me feel better.  Today was my Grandma's birthday and she's been gone about three years now.  We were really close and it's always a hard day for me.  But that b*tch yesterday sure didn't make it any easier.  Ugh! 

Oh well.  I'll channel my inner Scarlette:  Tommorrow will be another day.

Sorry you have to deal with that. You should really not let it get to you. If she's been doing all the stuff to lose weight, and now see's you dropping weight, I bet she is just jealous that you are being a sucess and She is not.

If she's nasty again, just stand there with a hugh smile on your face, that would **** anyone off cause they can't understand why your smiling...keep them guessing  and know that you did this for the right reasons. Then flip her off....lol