Really down

Hey all,

Sorry to be a debbie downer, but I need to share.  Since this WLS bill became law, I've been getting a lot of flak from people - some are my friends.  Comparing WLS to teeth whitening and a boob job.  Saying I should pay for it out of pocket because now because I am fat (and in their eyes, completely preventable and selfish) I am going to raise the rates of everyone's insurance.

It's really hurtful.  I've tried to 'educate them'.  And it does nothing but fuel the fire.

Make's me sad and want to rethink my decision sometimes.

And, I wish I didn't have to do this, ultimately.  And i don't - no one is holding a gun to my head.  But I know without this we won't be able to get pregnant and start a family.  My job will suffer.  I will suffer.

I guess I needed to vent.  DH, bless his heart feels awful that this is making me feel so bad and just tells me to forget them and block it out.  I can't.

Anyway - congrats to everyone with dates and other exciting things like being pregnant!

I am doing well with my eating and once I get my insurance approval back, I have to go weigh in with Nancy (because I was 1 pound over goal) and I'll get my date. :)

I KNOW in my heart this is the right thing.  But, like everyone has said... It ain't the easy way out, even though that's what everyone not involved thinks.....

Thanks for listening....

Jenn,

I am so sorry---just remember they are ignorant.  I mean really , this is NOT going to raise anyones rates....if anything WLS is proving to be a cost management issue.  My doc says that the reason ins. was fighting it was because they are hoping to up up enough hoops so that they will be on another ins. by the time their surgery comes around.  I guess people hop jobs pretty frequently and change insurances.

But really, I currently in copays spend $80/per month on meds....can you imagine how quickly my surgery is going to pay for itself for the Ins. co?

Only YOU can determine if this is right for you.  Teeth whitening and a boob job???  C'mon.  I wouldn't call these folks friends!  I have been very reluctant to tell many people because I don't want to hear the 'why dont you just put your nose to the grindstone and do the work required for WL'.  You know, if I could have, I would have----stats say diet and exercise only work 3% of the time for MO people......

Don't let the ignorant people get you down! 
Michelle

I'm sorry that you're having to deal with this nonsense. People are idiots sometimes. You know that you are doing something to protect your health, and that's all that matters.

Some people are idiots!  Can;t change everyone in the world I suppose.

Thanks - I just need to separate myself from negative people.

Hi Jenn, You said it - separate yourself emotionally from people who won't or can't be supportive.  Of course it hurts when your efforts to include or educate don't work.  People's comments or opinions can throw us.  At least, I  know I am often tossed by the casual comment or passionate conviction that oposses my own.  I have often been advised to take a "F" them attitude in such cases.  I don't because it really doesn't help me much.  It helps me more to fully accept that another's point of view or experience or inclination is simply different than mine.  They have the right to hold that opinion and I have an equal right to hold mine.  Separate is exactly the word that applies.  If you don't 'believe in WLS' then don't have WLS surgery.  That's my motto. 
   You've worked very hard to get to this point, Jenn.  And I suppose you can lament the need for WLS as opposed to a successful 'diet'.  I'm 46 and I've dieted my way up from 140 to 250 lbs over the last 26 years in an endless succession of diet methods.  I no longer have any doubts about what I will weigh if I don't have WLS and I really have had all the surgery I ever wanted already!  So some of the comments you've faced wouldn't hardly make a dent in me.  I'm more focused lately on the wonder and appreciation that another path is available in the first place.  But that's my story and not yours.  Be strong and search your own heart.  These folks and their point of view won't matter much when the surgery is said and done.  Then it will be you, your lifestyle and your supports and not much else will matter, I'm thinking.  I support you, Jenn.  Treading

 Jenn, I too am sorry you have to put up with such nonsense but unfortunately many people are uninformed. (That's not really the word I was thinking). But believe me once you have the surgery you will see things so differently. You know how difficult it was to make this decision, you know the fear you feel of the unknown. Being post op now I know that the surgery itself is difficult, the recovery is difficult and I still have fear of the unknown BUT I feel WONDERFUL and I am so proud of myself. My decision to have WLS has benefited me and my family and anyone else who care about me. I will live a happier healthier and I hope much longer life because of it. 
These negative people don't go away what I've learned is that I have to go away from them. I still hear comments from a couple of people at work but as the pounds come off I could care less what they think or say. I use it as motivation. 
You will make the best decision for yourself. Listen to you heart because the mind can play tricks on us. Best of luck to you.