Need some opinions.

A few months ago I asked a similar questions but my cir****tances have changed.  My mom just passed away on the 2nd.  She was my best friend, I am very sad and I miss her so.  I am scheduled to have R&Y on July 29th.  I know it is the best for me and my mom would want me to have surgery working towards getting healthy.  But, I am concerned, I have heard that emotionally the surgery changes can be hard, and I am not sure I can handle more on top of the emotions of losing my mom.  She lived with us, so it has been a huge change. Everyone that has had the surgery do you think it will be too much??

I lost my dad on November 8th and I had my surgery Dec 12th.  My family is close and my dad and mom lived about 3 blocks from me and my husband.  We saw each other several times a week.  I was fine through it all.  I was emotional, very emotional, those first two weeks post-op, so be prepared for that.  Otherwise, I think you'll be all right.  I'm sure your mom would not want you to postpone for her.  Know that she is watching over you and that you have her blessings.  Good luck.  (((HUGS)))

Thank you so much for your response.  Even though I hate that you lost your father, it is comforting to know that someone has made it through the same kinda of situation.  Last night was a bad night and I was feelin very discouraged.  My family have been very supportive and my husband surprised me by saying how much he wants me to do the surgery because I have worked so hard the last few months to change some habits.  But thank you for your response, it was so helpful.

Hi Kimberly,

First of all, please let me express my condolences on your loss.

While I understand your concern, I have to say that I suffer from very severe, dibilitating clinical depression and while you may have some emotional 'baggage' to handle after the surgery, I do believe that it will be manageable and more than that, I think that the benefits will far outweight any stress it may add. I personally did not find that the surgery caused sigificant additional emotional stress for me. I had other issues to deal with that were much more difficult for me. In some ways the metamorphosis that I underwent after surgery sort of helped me and gave me something very positive to look forward to as the scale dropped and the new me unfolded.

I wish you all the best,

 

Barbara,

Thank you for your response.  I want you also to know what an inspiration both you and your husband were when I met you both. I hope that I can do what you and your husband have. 

Kimberly,
I haven't had my WLS yet but I just wanted to say how sorry I am for the loss of your mother. Please be comforted knowing you gave her a home and helped take care of her. Now, take care of you. You are in my prayers. Jackie

Thank you so much for your message.  When is your surgery?

Hi Kimberly,
I am so sorry about the loss of your mother.
I feel by having surgery it allows you to move ahead with your life towards a healthy better way.
Sometimes some of us do have some emotions that get stired up after surgery.
What I have been told is we are grieving over loosing food.
Many of us have been emotinal over eatters for a long time we have surgery and wake up and relize we can no longer eat like we used to.
Me personally I still have days where I want to stuff but I know it is physically impossible.
I found to accept my choice for wls was one of the best things I have done for my health.
                                                            Annie

Thank you for your response.  I have always been a bit of an emotional eater but for the past week I have been not wanting to eat.  I know my mom would want to have surgery, she was so behind me. 

My heartfelt sympathy for you about the loss of your mom.

Only you know your boundries. But I did not get depressed after my surgery. I was so charged up it did not bother me about the loss of food or the big  changes. I have heard that some people do. Besides your mother will be watching you and cheering you on from a higher place. At least  with my religous beliefs.. I believe my mother is yelling her cheers for me. The angels will be telling both of our mothers to calm down. I hope I am not stepping on religeous toes  but this is how I look at it.

Good Luck on your decision.
Myrtis