Problem eating!

I am a little down in spirit today. I am having a problem eating. Its nothing wrong with the food. I just don't have an appetite and Im never hungry. I am also a little depressed that I'll never be able to sit and have dinner with my family again. My family loves to eat and we celebrate with dinners alot. I go back to work tomorrow and I feel as though going back to work and getting out of the house will help me. I just wanted to know anyone's take on this.

I'm nearly 5 months out and I eat because my watch says it's time - not because I'm hungry. (never in a million years did I think that would ever happen to me). As far as family dinner go - my family is the same as yours - every celebration, success, failure and what have you always involve food. I still participate, but I just  eat off of my little bread plate and focus more on the people than the food. It does get easier. My folks all know that regardless of the menu, I'll be bringing deviled eggs since those are a safe food for me to eat.

Getting out of the house will help you feel normal again. Good Luck.

- Iris

thank you so much. i think things will come together once im out of here and back at work.

Hi Ivory,

I'm sorry that you are struggling so right now, but please do know that this too shall pass. I think that you are right, you will do better as you get back to work and out and about. Early on, like you I was distressed that I wouldn't be able to eat with my family in the ways that I had... and to an extent, I guess that may be true, but overall, I have to tell you that now that I'm 19 months post op, I function very well. I am able to enjoy holiday and birthday celebrations. I don't eat nearly as much as I used to, but I am able to enjoy these events now. It takes time, but it will get better. As a matter of a fact, this weekend my nephew, his wife and daughter came up for a visit and I made a lovely family dinner. I was able to enjoy pretty much everything that was on the table. My DH who just had surgery the week before you, had a much more limited menu, but was able to sit and have dinner with us and enjoy the food and company.

Some of this comes from learning to cook a bit differently. I'm a huge fine of Cooking Light now because it allows me to rework old favorites and learn to adapt to new ones. So, I cook lighter than I used to and on top of that I don't eat as much. Those two things together, allow me to still enjoy the festivities, but with a moderation that allows me to enjoy these hard won losses in weight and gains in quality of life.

I hope the same for you... Please feel free to PM me if you have questions or just want to talk.

All the best,

Ivory,
This is so very normal, sweetie.  I was not hungry, not one day, for at least 6 months postop.  I ate because I had to eat to live, instead of live to eat.  You do mourn food, and that is completely normal because it has been your friend and comforter for a long time, if you're like me.  There's a reason they call mac & cheese "comfort food".  It makes you feel good to eat it!  At least that was one of mine.  

Everything we do in our family revolves around food, too.  And work -- we constantly face parties, don't we?  But you will learn what your limits are and what are safe choices for you, and gradually learn that the party is just as good, the company is just as good, when you are not there just to eat but to enjoy the fellowship.  

I can't wait to see you at work!  And I know everyone else is going to be just as excited!

thanks so much. its just weird. i really have to get on a sched with eating. im still relying on the protein shakes as a means of nutrition. once i go back to work i think things will start to come together.

Hey Ivory:

That is so normal!!  It took me about 6 months to get an appetite back and i wi**** didn't..lol.   You will learn what you can eat and the amounts as time goes on.  It is trial and error and what i couldn't eat at 3 months, i can do now with no problems.   I am polish and our entire life revolves around food.  I made Christmas dinner and ate a few bites of ham, a few bites of turkey, a bite of mashed potatoes and some steamed veggies.   I am down 116 lbs and do not feel like i am missing out.   I also had a sliver slice of pumpkin pie for dessert a few hours later.   It is now wonderful to know I don't have to pig out and actually can't (or i will be sick).

Take care and good luck getting back to work.

Pam

p.s.   you may be tired for the first few weeks going back to work as i have been told the anesthesia stays in your system up to 6 weeks and can make u feel that way.

Looking at your surgery date, this is so normal.  I did the same thing.  Give yourself a few weeks/months and you will be able to enjoy those family dinners again.  Just on alot smaller scale and in smaller clothes!  Don't know about everybody else but family dinners are alot more fun in my 34" pants than they were before. 

Goodmorning Ivory,
I dont have much time to get on my soap box about food this morning.
You can still enjoy family gatherings parties ect.. you just are not able to eat as much as others.
At dinner I always use a salad plate and many times am not able to eat everything.
I always listen to my pouch when I feel full I stop.
                                         Annie

Hi Ivory, just let me say I know where you are coming from and it is hard and I'm 3 months out and still have trouble just eating without getting sick so I'm glad I don't have that appetite at the moment but it was hard over Christmas being around all the non weight loss food and I did paid for it when I tried eating something that my pouch didn't like. I just went to the Nut yesterday and she told me to up my protein drinks to 80grams a day and then 20 more in ground turkey or ground beef because that is the only meat that doesn't make me sick and getting in that much protein is going be hard for me I know but my hair is falling out really bad and hopefully this will help. PM me if you need anymore support.