Is this normal?

I've been depressed all week when I should be really happy, 16 days out today and I've lost a couple more pounds but waiting until I go to the doctor to post again. I find it depressing to have to get all the protein liquids, water in plus having to eat too.I just have no desire to eat and the first time in my life having to force myself to eat. I'm becoming to realize that my life before did revolve around food and that's sad. Before this surgery I was out everyday if I was not sick and everyday I went somewhere to eat or to pick it up and bring it home. Now I have no desire to go anywhere and that's not like me, for the last 3 days I've stayed right on this computer looking up recipes off the recipe board here and just WLS in general. I did make myself go to Wal-mart yesterday and my mind told me I liked this or that food but the thought of eatin ...yuck. I've been seeing a counselor for over a year because I know I have an eating problem or did should I say, but havn't seen her since before surgery and do have an appt with her next week, so I'm looking forward to that. She has me to keep a journal and boy is she going to get an ear full when I read it to her lol. I wanted to go back to the gym this week but the gym says they have to have written paperwork from the doctor and I've left message I need that but they haven't called me back yet. I've tried to get out and walk but again I'm having to force myself to. I really need some advice on how to get pass these feelings and start enjoying my new life. Please help!

Cindy:

Hon, what you feel is that buyer's remorse and you are really a little over 2 weeks out and I promise it will get better. I had lots of naseau early out and was on nexium for several months and it was probably 4-6 months before I learned and felt what normal was. I am now a bit over a year out and wish I wasn't hungry like early out but wiithout the naseau and all.....lol. You will NOT always feel this way about food. I know that I felt the way you felt. It was a chore to eat and no fun either. I guess in some ways I mourned the loss of my friend, but now I can eat like a normal RNY gal. I do not miss food cause I eat fairly normal. I just eat small portions. There may be a tinge of sadness on a rare ocassion reminiscing of days when I could eat a big meal but I like the new and improved me much more now than before so it's not bad at all really. Hang in there and know that is the reality of RNY and the feelings it will bring up. I still struggle with emotional aspects of not being able to eat as my way of coping with my feelings. It is all a process. RNY doesn't fix our heads, you know. Again, hang in there. I think you may be expecting too much too soon.

Lisa

Thanks Lisa for understanding how I feel.

You're actually grieving. It's a weird side effect of WLS but it will pass. If you think about having ended any relationship abruptly - it makes sense. Food has been a part of every major celebration, comforter in low times and companion for boredom and ho-hum life - and now it's gone. Since you've been going to a counselor you may want to discuss this further with them but until you do - please know it's a very normal (often untalked about) side effect.

- Iris

Thanks Iris and you are right its a little like grieving.

Hey Cindy, It will pass, the longer the days pass the more energy and the wanting to get outside  wil come. Your body will adjust as each day passes. It will get better. (by the way we are nieghbors, i live in Supply and work at the complex in Bolivia)   A wls friend Bruce

Hey Bruce, thanks for the encouragement and nice to know there is someone else close by.

I had RNY 2 days after you and am going through the exact same thing. it's such a weird feeling. I'm so glad you brought this up, your post and the responses are just what i needed to hear today.

good luck to us both :)

Well I'm sorry your feeling this way too , and from what everyone is posting this is normal.

  Cindy!!!

I wish I lived closer!  Of course, you know I am pre-op, so I can't speak to you from experience, but I can tell you what comes to mind as I read your post. 

From someone that has suffered from depression/anxiety, the worse thing you can do is coop yourself up.  You probably already know this!  That can send you on a never-ending cycle that's hard to break free from.

The first thing I would do if I were you is to find every single support group you can within a reasonable driving distance and attend them!  I have 3 so far that I know of that meet each month and I will probably take full advantage of all 3 for awhile...and I'd even be open to adding more if I can find them!  That will get you out, and it will get you around people who can offer you the sympathy and support you need right now!

I'm so glad you are trying to get the note to take to your gym.  Increase that as your doctor allows...take advantage of any classes they offer that appeal to you.  I highly recommend water aerobics when you are able! 

Then, since you used to get out every day to go out to eat or to run and grab food to bring home, can you think of any replacements that you would enjoy?  The things I would enjoy would be a trip to the bookstore...find some excellent books to browse and curl up in a comfy seat with a yummy cup of hot tea or something.  Go to have a pedicure...those massage chairs and professional pedicurists...ohh lah lah!  (I'd also love to have manicures, facials, massages, etc.!)  Whatever fits into your budget (hey, you aren't buying food now!  lol) and your enjoyment...do it!  Get out of the house, start spoiling yourself in other areas and kiss those blues goodbye!  Like I said, I wish I lived closer...I'd be joining you!  :)

If you feel you can share what advice your counselor gives you, please do.  I'm making mental notes in preparation for this myself and I certainly hope the sun shines through for you soon!