Newbie Here

Hi,

My name is Ericka and I'm from Charlotte, NC.  I've been interested in Gastric Bypass for years, but I've never really been serious about it because I'm scared.  But every day, I get closer to my breaking point.  I'm tired of being obese.  I'm tired of my hips and legs killing me.  I'm tired of being out of breath...  I just don't know how else to fix this.  Since May, I've lost 14 pounds just following the food pyramid and exercising.  The problem is that I'm just so big that I'm extremely sore for days at a time.  My hips hurt so bad that it's difficult to sleep.  I just feel like I'm caught up in a viscious cycle.  I'm a nursing student and will be graduating in Dec.  Right now, I work part-time as a tech and because of my size it takes my body a couple days just to recover from the soreness.  :(

I don't know if gastric bypass is right for me.  I just know that I don't want to die from obesity.  I basically have been what I call "fit-fat" since my early twenties.  I was overweight but I could keep up.  Weight certainly didn't keep me down.  Over the last couple years though, the repercussions of obesity have crept up on me.  I don't bounce back anymore.  My heart races and I can't catch my breath with just walking. 

In the past, each time I've thought about the bypass, I've decided not to persue it because I felt that this was a permanent surgery that could kill me.  Why in the world would I do something so permanent with the possiblity of disastrous results?  Now I feel that if I don't do it, disastrous results are a certainty.  The other aspect of this that I'm worried about is my psychological dependence on food.  I understand that the bypass will physically help me, but I worry about beating it psychologically. 

I had a physical this week and officially my BMI is 45.  I'm 5'5 and 273 pounds, basically a blob of fat with a head.  I'm miserable, I'm depressed, I am broken.  

This morning I filled out a patient infomation form with Carolina Weightloss Surgery in Concord, NC.  I look forward to getting to know all of you, and I hope that I'm opening the door to a long and healthy life. 

Thank you for listening :)

Hi Ericka,

I am also pretty new to the board, but welcome.  Everyone here is great!  I have learned so much from just sitting back and lurking! LOL 

I am scheduled for LapBand on Aug 12.  I am excited and a tad bit nervous (butterflies), but can not hardly wait to start losing!!  So far I have lost about 12 lbs pre op.  I started this journey at 314 lbs. and am 5'1" so I know how you feel. 

Good luck on the journey you have begun. 

Vera

I was a 25yo fit fat person.  I had no co-morbs, and could still keep up.  But I didn't want to have to work so hard to do so.  Gastric bypass saved me alot of heartache and pain over the years, and I'm glad I decided to have the surgery.

Let us know if there's anything we can help you with on your journey.

Erica
I hear your pain and believe me I know exactly how you feel...I am going to be having surgery on Friday with Dr. Pirrello with Carolina Weight Loss Surgery.  You picked an EXCELLENT surgeon (Pirrello or Bauman) and you'll be in great hands.  I too had concerns about dying...still do....but Dr. Pirrello and Dr. Bauman have NEVER lost a patient.  Can there be complications?  Sure...but there can be complications with ANY surgery.

Explore all of your options and share your concerns.  Although the decision will ultimately be yours, getting all the information you can will help.  There were many times I felt like backing out or I kept saying to myself  "why am I so weak that I can't do this on my own?"   What I have learned is that even though I will be having the surgery, I will still be doing this on my own.  Having the surgery is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of bravery and taking back control of my life.  We can all lose weight with dieting, but it doesn't stay off.  I recently lost 14 lbs. in 2 weeks, but I know that I have 100 more to go.  Doubtful I could ever do that without having surgery as a tool to help me along.

I live in Matthews and work at Weddington Middle School.  If you ever just want to talk, let me know.  I haven't had my surgery yet, but I would be happy to share my experience with you after I do on Friday.

Keep your chin up...I hope you will find the answers you're looking for and peace in your heart with whatever decision you make!

Michele

Welcome, Erika and Vera!
I understand your concerns.  It's a process.  I didn't get morbidly obese overnight and it took me decades of pain and self-loathing to finally recognize that things were not getting any better.  In fact, every time I went to the doctor, I came home with a new Rx to fill.  The last time before I decided to have the surgery, my blood sugar levels were creeping up and I knew I would soon become a diabetic if I didn't do something.  I was in CONSTANT pain in my back, knees and hips, and hated my life.

It's been a year since my surgery.  I haven't lost all the weight I had hoped to lose within that time, and I would still like to get to goal, but I am content with where I am now.  I wear a size 10 and some 8s and that is a far cry better than where I was a year ago.  I am off all meds and believe me I took plenty!  Actually I just started with nexium again as I was starting to experience some stomach irritation and also didn't want to have any side effects from the Rx for Boniva (to prevent osteoporosis) that I am now taking again.  And I have replaced meds with vitamins, so it's not about not taking pills...  lol.  But my labs are all good and I am virtually pain free and a much happier camper.  My PCP just told me I have added 10 years to my life.  Now it's my job to make them 10 good ones!

I wish you both the best in your journey.  Please keep us posted and let us know if there is anything we can do to help!

Welcome Erika and Vera !

I feel that I am relatively new too - I am waiting for my surgeon appt on August 6th in Hickory. 

And Erika - I feel your pain.  I have been so miserable this year and made the decision to do something about it.  I plan to have the lap band.
I have been a paramedic with the county full time and just retired after 24 years - mainly because I was having trouble climbing in and out of ambulances this year.  I work part time as an LPN at a local ER.  Have been doing that for years.  But this year, I become short of breath just walking from the parking lot to the time clock.  So it was time to do something because doing it on my own wasn't working out too well....

So congratulations on your decision.  We will hold hands as we embark on this journey and learn from the wonderful people on this site that have alread been there.

Shelia

Hey Ericka:

I am 53 yrs old and 5 months post-surgery for RNY.   It took me 2 years or longer to make the decision.  I knew if i didn't do it obesity would kill me.  My bp was 140/90 with meds.   The end of May my doc took me off bp meds and my bp the last time i took it was 111/66.   I am down 88 lbs in 5 months which i could never have done on my own.   This is a personal decision that only you can make.  This board has been wonderful for support and i could never have done it without the wonderful ppl here. 

Welcome to the NC board and good luck in making your decision.

Take care, Pam

Hi Erica,

Welcome to the NC forum of ObesityHelp. I think that you will find plenty of support and compassion here. I have found it to be a significant part of my success with this WLS journey I embarked on 2 years ago. I had my surgery about 15 months ago and have been very successful with it. I thought about doing it for more than a decade and I have to tell you that I had the same fears and concerns that you have. I also have to say that my only regret is that I didn't do it sooner. (Please feel free to read my profile for an overview of my journey to a healthier me.)

We are about the same starting size and I have to say that when I was where you are today, I couldn't quite imagine myself being where I am today. I hoped I would be smaller than I was before and healthier, but I honestly wasn't able to relate to the normal size person that I am now because I had never been a 'normal' size since childhood. I'm still working on adjusting to the new me, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

You are so very right that the surgery is one critical part of helping you to strip off the weight and in the long term giving you a significant tool to help you keep it off, but in the longer term, it's going to also mean being able to get your head around the issues and behaviors that got us to the point that we were when we made the decision to undergo WLS. I honestly don't thing I could do what I do now if I hadn't gone through the process I've gone through in the past year. If you check this board, you'll a thread I posted regarding longterm success and that it appears that we have a very good chance of not only loosing the weight, but also in making the changes necessary to keep the weight off for good.

If there is anything that I can do to help you in your journey, please do not hesitate to let me know.

Wishing your all the best in your journey to a healthier you,

Barb

Ericka~
Welcome to the NC board, nice to have you!!

Darcie

Welcome Ericka.  I think we all feel you to some degree.  I was 425 at my highest and while it was a fairly fit fat, I was miserable.  I struggled with many of the same feelings you have, some of which you can read on my blog. 

I think that WLS was well worth it for me, I would do it again without hesitation.
Take care and good luck with your surgery.
Ellen