OT My Grandma AND my Uncle

Im about to flip out and have a anxiety attack... my mom called today and said today is day 5 with no water or food for my Grandma. She is in the hospital and cannot speak but can shake her head yes and no. I had my mom put the phone up to her ear and I started talking to her and I completley broke down and lost it. My mom said when she took the phone back, that when my Grandma heard my voice she opened her eyes and smiled. I was going to fly out to Oregon but by the time I get there I know it will be too late. I just called my Uncle who lives by my Grandma and HE was just admitted to the hospital and is three doors down from my Grandma.. he is having complications with Thorasic bone spurs in his back... he just had surgery a few weeks ago and he thought he was having a heart attack this morning so now I have my Grandma who will leave us at any second and my Uncle who is in pain BUT will be ok. I cannot take anymore of this and I wanted to vent at the one place where I know I can get support... here with my wonderful friends, the only real friends I have.

I dont know how much longer my Grandma has because she is not hooked up to a IV or a feeding tube and she does not want to continue on. They did a CT scan of her lung last night and it has grown another centimeter over night so its 9 CMs and she is Stage 4.... I feel so helpless 3000 miles away but my mom and my aunt are with her. She requested that she has no funeral so closure is very hard for me. She wants to be cremated with her ashes scattered with my Grandpas up on Mt. Rose in Nevada. Thanks everyone for your kind pms and thoughtfulness... Im really down right now and it seems everything happens at once... the icing on the cake is my mom and my aunts birthday (they are twins) is Saturday... if anyone can throw out a prayer for my Grandma to go peacefully I would really appreciate it. THanks again everyone for listening to my ramblings.

Darcie

(((((Darcie))))),

I'm so very sorry for the pain that you are enduring as you are losing someone so very dear to you. While I know that you intellectually know that she is in the best hands, I'm sure it's heartwrenching to not be 'there.' I pray for a gentle passing for your grandmother as she moves on. I also pray that your uncle will have a swift and gentle recovery.

I know that your grandmother doesn't want a funeral, but I was wondering if you might be able to go when her ashes are distributed in Nev? While it's not a 'conventional' way to say 'goodbye' and provide closure, it might have it's own sweet memories and way and place for you to 'formally' reflect on her life and your loving relationship with her. Funerals and memorials are not only a way to honor those who have passed, but also a way for us to begin the necessary 'mourning' journey that we all must travel as we lose someone who has been such a special part of our lives. If going to Nevada isn't an option, maybe doing something else that is specifically in memory of her would work.

I'm keeping you and your whole family close in my thoughts and prayers.

Warmly,

Barb

Darc.... Big hugs to you.....I am glad that you had the chance to speak to your Grandma and I'm sure she was too.  Remember to take care of YOU during this time, ie: water and vitamins.  Keep us posted.......will keep all in my prayers. Nancy

Darcie, I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother and uncle.  I will keep you in my prayers.  I know the heartache of losing someone special to you, I lost my mother six years ago to lung cancer just know that she will be in peace and no more suffering.  God Bless you! Lisa

((((((((((((((Darcie))))))))))))))))) I'm so sorry. I know first hand how hard it can be to lose someone close to you. Within 6 months I lost my father (unexpectedly) and my grandmother. it is no fun.  I'm here if you need to talk. Love ya girl!!!!!!  My prayers are with you and your family.

Darcie- Take care of yourself and i will say a prayer for your Grandma and Uncle. I lost my Dad back on May5 and it's been hard. Will the luck of the Irish let her have peace. Later, Ken

Hey Darc.. I am so sorry to hear about your grandma and uncle.  Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.  If you need a shoulder, you've got mine friend.   Love ya girl.

((((((((Darcie)))))))))

Hey Darcie: So sorry to hear about your family right now.  It is horrible to be so far away from our loved ones at times like this.   I hope your grandmother has a peaceful journey and can be with your grandfather again.   Hopefully, your Uncle will be pain free soon.  Please make sure to take care of yourself.  Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. take care and God Bless, Pam