OT: Overwhelmed

I've sort of been dancing around a topic for a time, but wanted to let y'all know why I don't post so much anymore.  My husband of 18 years has decided to leave me.  Before anyone thinks that this marriage is a WLS casualty, it isn't.  We'd had problems before surgery.  He is out, as I write this putting in his application for an apartment.  We've both met with lawyers and are working towards an equitable agreement.  Our children do not know yet, at least not how far along it is.  I have made it clear to him that I love him and do not want this to end, but he seems determined to do this.  I believe that God is in control and can turn this around if it is His will to do so.  I am finding it hard to hold it together some days though. So anyway, in the interest of being "real" I wanted to let you all know what was up.  I'm here and will answer any email I get, but I just can't keep up with all the posts, as this is an active board these days.  I just don't want anyone to feel slighted. For those that pray, I covet your prayers.  Take care. Ellen

I'm so sorry Ellen.  :( (((hugs))) I will definitely keep you in my thoughts and prayers.  I can't imagine what you must be going through.

Thanks Amy. Ellen

  I can't say I know what you are going through, but I'm here if you need or want a shoulder. Stay strong and keep the faith.  Hugs

Thanks Shawana.  I'm trying to stay strong, some days are easier than others.  I guess knowing he's out there looking for an apartment makes it more real today. Ellen

Ellen,       I am So sorry to hear about this. Divorce is something I wouldn't wish on anyone. Especially when you don't want it. I can relate completely as I experienced this 10 ago. You are completely right about placing this in God's hands and you just have to have faith that it will work out to your betterment no matter what the outcome. It is a VERY emotional time and your concerns have to be bigger than these boards. To be sure, we can understand why you are distracted and your mind is elsewhere. Remember that you OH family is here for you and don't feel alone. I shall say my prayers for you and hope that things will get better for you! Lisa

Thanks for the encouragement Lisa.  I know God has me, I'm trying to stand on that.  It's good to know that you've been through this and survived.  Some days it feels like the world is ending, but most of the time I know better. Ellen

Ellen,               You are so strong. With God on your side I know you are in the best hands. Know that God using this situation right now for a purpose, although you may not know what yet...you will some day. It may be true for your husband also. I pray that God comforts your hurting heart and gives you the answers you seek. Hugs   Sarah

Thanks Sarah.  I appreciate your prayers and support.  God has been comforting me, I would have fallen apart before now if not.  "But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."  Isaiah 40:31 Ellen

(((Ellen)))

I know what a horrible devastating time this is for you.  This is not God's will.  This is your husband's choice.  God gave us free will, as you know, not all use it wisely.  It could be your husband is going through a mid life crisis.  He may not even really know why at this point.  I will surely pray for your family.  Please don't worry about anyone feeling slighted!  You have been kind and supportive to so many here.  All marriages have problems.  If you really want to save the marriage, don't make it so easy for him.  I believe you all will have to be separated legally for one year before he can file.  Be strong, talk to your pastor, have the elders of your church pray.  There is tremendous power in prayer.  How many children do you all have? These things are always hardest on the children, so you will have to be very strong. Do you work outside of your home?  If you are looking for employment where you can work at home, there is a GREAT company called VIPDESK.COM where you can be a customer service rep for Bluefly.com (and other companies that sell online).  You will have to pass background check and commit to minimum of 25 hrs per week.  I buy my new clothes from Bluefly and the girl I was ordering from was telling me that VIPDesk.com just took over the Bluefly contract and they are hiring now, great pay!  Plus you get 20% off all their products... check it out. Stay strong in your faith, trust in the Lord Ellen.  He's seen you this far, He will see you through this. Love in Christ, Diane