Out of the mouths of babes!!

While driving home after picking my 6 year old up this afternoon, she asks "Mommy, am I fat or thin?".  Since she is not bigger than a minute, I replied that she was thin.  She then comes back with "Well if I am thin than you must be fat.  Are you fat mommy?".  I calmly replied that yes I was but that it wasn't nice to tell people they were fat because it might hurt their feelings.  She then comes back with "We learnt that people get fat from eating too much.  Mommy, if you just stop eating maybe you won't be fat anymore".  Fighting back my tears, the only thing I could get out was "Maybe".  Not my best moment as a parent but I am sure it is something I will need to get used to.  I am sure the day will come when my child is picked on because her mom is obese.  Boy, do I ever want to eat something right about now!!  Can feel the tears coming back as I sit here and type!

 

Oh my, do I ever understand this one.  Even though it wasnt my child but it was my only nephew and godchild, he is 4.  It was painful when he started to see me as fat and not just his cool aunt GiGi.  It broke my heart.  He is one of the reasons I decided to have surgery.  I didnt want to embarrass him....I missed his Christmas play because I felt the kids might make fun of me and in turn him.  I thought of all the things I would miss in his l;ife because of my obesity....and I got mad...mad at food, which made me more determined.  I feel your pain, I am very open with him now....he saw my scars, he gives me exercise tips lol  I think you handled yourself the best you could being caught off gaurd.  Cry but dont eat...get mad at the food and the power it has over you, take your life back girlie....you can do it!!!  For you and your little girl! 

I hope that once youre tears have dried, you will be able to have another talk with your daughter, to impress on that young mind,  that people come in all shapes and sizes, and that its not always because they eat too miuch. That people of all sizes are worthy of love and acceptance and respect,  We all have our own concepts of beauty, but we never have the right to poke fun of, or hurt someones feelings . Let her hear about your struggles, and be proud of you for all your efforts to get your health back. You will be her biggest teacher, ( no pun intended, lol)

I know it's hard Liz.  I had a similar experience with Caity.  I told her she was beautiful inside, and asked her what she saw when she saw me...and she said I was beautiful too.

This probably isn't what you want to hear, but then I locked myself in my room and cried.  I knew what I looked like and hated myself, but I never wanted her to see me that way.  And there it was, the truth.  I hated what had happened to me and felt helpless for years. 

Flash forward a few years, and for  the first time in my life I have control.  I have the tools to change.  I made the decision to have my lap band and take back my life.

You know that I love you Liz and you are beautiful on the inside, and always will be.  We have been friends for years, and I won't like you be defined by your weight.

You have a chance to change the outside....don't let it hurt you too much.  Your a great mom and Kara loves you.