I have been outed!!!!`

I went to my home town today to see my 2 elderly sisters. One of my sisters that there is a rhoumor going around that I am waiting for a call to go  to the George Dumont Hospital to see a doctor about some kind of diet. She was confused about the diet part- I suspect that she doesn't know anything about WLS, so she interpreted it as a diet. I just played dumb. I have only told 2 people in Fredericton and no one from home. That is what I get for posting it on the internet. I wasn't concerned about talking freely here because I haven't lived there for 38 years and my last name has changed. Nothing I can do about it....the only thing that bothers me is my 4 children don't know. My son has several friends there- I hope no one tells him.

I wish I had the courage to keep my mouth shut about it... I regret it cause everybody, or almost everybody in my life knows.

I feel the same way about talking freely on this site about it though since you all understand what I'm going through... I still have the occasional, really??  YOU are going??  why would you need that??

I just bite my tongue!!!!

I have chosen not to tell because I don't want to deal with people saying not to do it because it is dangerious or be accused of taking the easy way out, or listen to stories of those who have failed and gained the weight back.  I also don't want my sisters to worry- they are in their late 70's snd having  health problems of their own. I guess that I thought it was my business who I told. Now when I do come out to my sisters, I will have to admit I lied by omission today. At the very least I miss led them. Oh well, what is done is done.  I just have to trust that who ever talked, didn't know that I have not told people and didn't realize that she was outing me. She probably didn't understand the power of the small town gossip machine either. LOL
I hope people realize they should be careful about talking to non-OHers about what is said here or even who is posting here.

small town gossip...i know that too well!!!!   :)

Yeah.....My birth family- my father actually-  was prominent  when I was growing up and people left Dad alone, but us kids were fair (or unfair depending on your point of view) game.  I was no angel, but whatever I did was blown out of recognition and embellished a LOT.  At times, stories were just plain fiction. At least this time it was the truth.

Hi Charline

Just thought I would share how very few people- friends and family I have let into my WLS world.

I know what  your are going thru- I have only let a small circle of friends and family into my WLS world. I decided before surgery after I had heard years of nay-sayers that this was my decision and my business and I was going to tell only the people in my life that are supportive and will contribute to my success.

Another factor in my decision was my 12 year old daughter 11 at the time of WLS does not and still does not know- I had some failing health before surgery and then a rough road afterwards so I did not want to have to open the topic of WLS with her and one she very very sensitive and have her think one day will this happen to her - she is active and perfect just the way she is- I think its a personal decision with kids and I know a lot of people support telling but I discussed it with  my husband and dr and I truly felt I may feel better when I tell her but she wont - she will be worried sick and thank god I didnt with all my complications.

Most of the time she is happy for the new me - look/energy/change in mood etc but if people comment on how much I have changed and look nothing like I did before she gets really upset and will cry that I dont look like her  Mommy anymore- I tell her all the positive things that have come from me becoming active and getting healthier and all the things we can do together but she still sits on the fence about all the changes- the doctor said give her time and dont force her to be rejoicing with you - in her mind her mommy has changed and she is still weighing benefits! LOL

I had so many complications and troubles and I am so glad I followed my plan- the ol' nay- sayers would have been running to the hospital to tell me the " I told you so" crap I didnt need to hear..... so I am just over 6 months post op and I proud of my accomplishments but will not let family or friends who dont know what this life change involves or the commitment I have taken on-  judge me or my decisions.

I had a lot of blue days when I was 2-4 months post op and thought oh I wish I had more people supporting me and I feel so alone but I am stubborn and would not tell those who I didnt think could offer me hope or encouragement.

You know I learned early out through this board and and other online sources - strangers can be the most thoughtful supportive network one can have on this journey.

I think the saying goes- "Friends- the family I got to choose to be in my life ! "  lol

Take care and Happy New Year
Deb

Sorry to hear that Charline.  Unfortunately small towns have a better communication system than Aliant sometimes.  Hope that it goes no further and things are ok.

I do hope you will keep posting.  Your humor and information is always welcomed.  Unfortunately one never knows who could be online (either as a member or visiter) and come across your picture. 

When it comes down to the day there needs to be some explaining, I pray your family will understand and appreciate the care you made in protecting them.  Take care.

Oh I am not going to stop posting- I like you guys too much and appreciate your support  too much to stop. The situation is a lot of things- frustrating, annoying etc, but it is not the end of the world.

If you want to you could remove your picture and change your on line name.  That way no one would see you while surfing.