Ignorance or Just Plain Thoughtless?

Yesterday afternoon I picked my 13-month-old grandbaby up at daycare. My daughter-in-law told them that I would need someone to carry the baby to the car because I have recently had surgery. One of the workers I have known since I was a baby and I guess she asked what type surgery and my DIL told her. So this woman and another one proceeded to quiz me about my surgery. I told them that I had thoroughly researched WLS and I checked out my surgeon. And I told them that yes I was scared but I prayed about it and felt that this was the best option for me. The woman that I knew carried the baby to the car, continuing to tell me how scared she was to have it, etc. Then she looked at me and said "You know they say that having this surgery takes 10 years off your life." I was flabbergasted. I said well I've never read that or heard that but what I have read is that being morbidly obese can shorten someone's life. So do you think she just didn't think about how that statement would make me feel?

Sounds like a big ol' helping of sour grapes to me. My family motto has always been 'Illigitamate Non Carborundum Est' or 'Don't let the b*stards grind you down'. The next time anybody gives you that ten years off your life business just fire back that being fat was going to take 20 years off your life so you had a net gain of 10 by having WLS. You did the right thing. She is just jealous. Meghan

Thanks, Meghan! You're probably right, she's just jealous because I did something she's only thought about.

Well, tell them that having surgery has added twenty back to your life so you are ahead as far as you are concerned. Most people just have a problem with someone being smaller than they are. When you are smaller, they feel inadequate, resentful and sometimes vicious, to you. I don't tell people, just smile and say, my doctor recommended that I change my lifestyle, it is a health thing. They usually don't say any more after that! Smiles, Cheryl

Well, no. WITHOUT SURGERY: 75% chance of not living to see Em graduate from high school (she was in the 7th grade at the time.) WITH SURGERY: 4% chance of dying during or within the first month after surgery (mine was higher than normal cause I was bigger than big.) or to translate 96% chance of living to whatever the normal age of death is considered to be now - 76 or so? - well, let's just say a 96% chance of a normal life span..... So if I LOST 10 years, that's okay cause I GAINED about 30 or more years!!!! smoochers Arlies

Okay - lets just say it does take off 10 years... I was 30 when I had my surgery. I wasnt living then. I worked - went home - ate - slept - woke up - ate - slept. Is that living? No... Now, I get up and LIVE. I dont agree with it taking 10 years off but if it were true I would take it because the years I DO have now I AM LIVING and not just surviving. Lots of things shorten your life - - - shoot you can die now from a mosquito bite. Being morbidly obese will KILL YOU! There is nothing in the world like racing your children to the car (and winning). Something I have not done since she was born. She is 9! Its nice to do that now. I have gotten more vocal since I have lost weight and when people say stupid things like that I have to pop off. Most people I know here in Texas dont know - but in Mississippi I worked with some dorks who were not WLS educated and I got alot of stupid questions and judgements. Most skinny natural "mutants" just dont understand because they have no clue what it is like to be fat. The fat people who fuss about it - I think they may be scared but mostly I think they may be jealous and that is their way of hiding it. ITS NOT FOR EVERYONE. There are ALOT of risks - but the more educated you are the better. Most people only hear the downs - only hear of the risks and deaths... Look at us ---- this board is FULL of success stories.