two funnies....
someone passed these to me, and just thought I would share.....
(Kim - you'll enjoy the last one, for some reason I thought about you and your children!)
THE MOMMY TEST
I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter.
She picked up something off the ground, and started to put it
in her mouth.
I took the item away from her, and I asked her not to do that.
"Why?", my daughter asked.
"Because it's been laying outside, you don't know where
it's been, it's dirty and probably has germs", I replied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total
admiration and asked, "Wow! How do you know all this stuff?"
"Uh,", I was thinking quickly, "All moms know this stuff.
It's on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let
you be a Mommy."
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was
evidently pondering this new information.
"OH...I get it!", she beamed, "So if you don't pass the test,
you have to be the daddy."
"Exactly", I replied back, with a big smile on my face and joy
in my heart.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Dear Lord," the preacher began with arms extended and a
rapturous look on his upturned face, "without you we are but dust..."
He would have continued, but at that moment one very obedient
little girl (who was listening carefully) leaned over to her mother,
and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mommy,
WHAT is butt dust?"
Church was pretty much over at that point...
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