Something in the air??

There has to be something in the air or the water around here. My DH (not necessarily meaning dear at this time) is being totally MEAN.. Funny thing is I have overheard many different conversations with women talking about their significant others being a pain in the butt. Mine has been on this "pick on Rhonda" bend now for about two weeks and many times he has hurt my feelings, I have told him this and he always laughs and says he was just kidding. How do I know he is really just kidding? Everything can't always be a joke... Last night I was cooking dinner, after working a 9.5 hour day, and he was negative about everything I did, either I put too much butter, not enough water, or should have put flour in it or how come I don't have clothes on washing yet...etc.. and on and on.... I felt like I was being attacked and I guess I just lost my mind for a while.. Finally after being ridiculed during dinner while I was trying to relax and eat, I got up, washed off my plate put it in the dishwasher and went to bed (at 7:30).... here he comes, wanted to pick at me some more... so I went to the bathroom shut and locked the door and took a long hot shower, took some tylenol pm and went to sleep.. This morning it is starting all over again... except now he wants to be all lovey dovey and sweet... I am still mad from last night. I don't want to be bothered.. So I just told him not to touch me and to leave me alone.. I feel bad about being mean to him but sometimes he REALLY gets on my nerves. I feel like I can not do anything right.... Enough about that.. now I have to go to the dentis.. Thanks for letting me vent... I love you all! Any body else having problems with their spouses being a pain in the butt??? Rhonda

Sweetie I'm sorry he is doing you that way. You vent all you want !!! I'll listen as long as you want to talk. Your a great person & he knows it, so does everyone else. Don't get down on yourself !!! I love you & would even if you shaved your head & walked backwards everywhere. May I suggest that when he goes to bed tuck the sheets in around him really good & tight, then bring out the broom handle. Hey, it sounds good !!! Honestly though.... maybe he just went over board picking, not realizing that he was hurting you until later. I say later because of the lovey dovey the morning after. Some men do that when they know they are in deep sh*t. I've been snappy for a few weeks & I know it !!! I'm not saying that it is right for me to be that way, but sometimes I honestly think that peope are looking to fight with me. You know what I mean ? It is like they are pushing my buttons on purpose. Now the reason I said that is............. sounds to me like he is wanting to push your buttons BIG TIME !!! I would sit his happy (for the moment) arse down & tell him a thing or two. Tell him that he is hurting you & you don't know why he thinks you deserve to be treated that way. Ask him why he is doing it. Just be sure to throw in afterwards that....... That these are your opinions that your entitled to think, feel & say !!! My hubby Johnny is a sweetie all the time & he has always been a Super Angel. But even more so since I had surgery. He listens to me cry, vent, pray, plead, beg, you name it & not once has he complained. He has been very supportive to me & never picks on me. So I can't say that I know what your going through. But I do feel for you & I am here for you. Tammy

Thank you Tammy for the words of wisdom. He came home this afternoon and was really quiet, and then once I started speaking he acted like nothing ever happened. I am still a little bit upset, but I will get over it in time. You are very lucky to have such a loving and caring husband that stands by you no matter what... I know our hormones run wild, both men and women, sometimes it is just too hard to deal with. I am feeling much better after reading these replies and having some time to just unwind. The dentist wasn't too hard on me, so I am okay tonight. But I do plan to go to bed soon, TIRED... Long days this week! Take Care, Love ya much! Rhonda

Hey Rhonda, I am very blessed with a great hubby. But more importantly right now..... I am glad that your feeling better. Try not to work too hard & take it easy once you get home. I know you've been under a lot of stress & you probably need a break from everything & everyone. I am here for you as much as you need & want me to be !!! Love ya Doll !!! Tammy

Heya Rhonda.. on the chance that mine may possibly find his way here and read what I write.. I'm gonna plead the fifth.. just remember .. u can't live with them, and u can't shoot'em U know , just try to ignore it, walk away, go to another room and leave him sitting alone in the living room when he starts on ya, it works for me. U never know how long before our guys get called out and how long they're gone, so try to just be patient and give him some slack.. sometimes they don't know whats wrong with THEM and they have only ONE outlet-- the spouse. Mine does this every now and then and for a day or so I wish he'd be out at sea... and the next day is fine again. Maybe it's PMS? Next time he starts on ya... hand him a bottle of MIDOL and say, here, u need this !!!! Just like our kids, spouses are PITAs sometime too. We all have mood swings and go offline sometime. Sounds to me like he knows he was mean, with him wanting to be all lovey dovey. Maybe you're a little more self confident these days and you take things a lot more serious than you used to? I know I do. There are things that never bothered me, if he does them/ says them now, I get upset and some days he's at a loss at what to do to complace my anger at him.... so he lets me run my course and I'm fine again. Just hang in there.. remember.. its HORMONES.. yours and his both Take care hon!! ~Andie~

Thanks for the pep talk Andrea... You are right it probably is hormones. Things are better now than they were yesterday. Stress is really a nasty thing!! We are leaving after lunch to go to Montgomery to a change of command for one of my boss' and it will be just me and DH going, so maybe a night alone will help things. We have a nice dinner planned and the Change of Command is in the morning, so maybe we will have a nice relaxful evening.. I bought myself a nice new nightie just for the occasion, and he has not seen me in a nightie post surgery, so it should be a night to remember.. (I hope) Talk to you soon, Rhonda

You tell MY man to stop it right now!!!!!! That lovey-dovey business has got to go!!!! I really do think guys have cycles too! Jim gets in a snit every once in a while....I ususally ignore him and go do something fun with Em or even by myself.....And believe it or not sometimes, I even get my feelings on my shoulders and when he looks at me, they fall off and I think he's being mean!!! It's probably the weather....makes my arthritis act up, so I guess it should make my men act up too! Sock him upside the head for me!!! Love you to bits and back! You skinny huzzy, you! Smoochies Arlies PS right now tho, Jim is happy as a clam....he got to go to a microsoft seminar today ....Just made his day!!!!

Thanks my dear Queenie... You know how aggravating Jay can be at times, you know him as good or better than I do. Sometimes he is the greatest and others he is his own worst enemy... He is being nicer last night and this morning so maybe he is out of his funk. We have a nice evening planned tonight and I hope that it will be a night to remember.. Thanks for the encouraging words. Love ya! Rhonda

As for as my opinion goes does he always act like this or is this unusual behavior? If it not like him then something is going on with him. He is upset or nervous about something. Maybe he is mad at you and really indirectly trying ot hurt your feelings. I would approach it like this. dont' say you are being mean to me or don't pick on me or me this and me that. I start by saying Now honey something is wrong and I don't like seeing oyu like this. You are getting on my nerves that is true but you seem like something is wrong here. I tell Tommy sometimes to go back outside and kick the dog because it ain't gonna happen like this much longer. I know our men get upset sometimes but htey have to be reminded we are not punching bags--not literally. He may want attention. Men are like kids. I am sure he is just trying to tell you something. I look back and this makes no sense. I know what I am trying to say but I don't think I got it over in this letter. Rant all you want to girl ---we surely understand if we have men in our lives. Jane

Thanks for the words of advice. Sometimes our men are just impossible to understand. He has been working alot and has some issues going on at work and I may have just rubbed him the wrong way, but things are getting better so I will let it go as he was stressed and in a funk. Thank you for your support, hope to see you soon... We need a Hattiesburg Luncheon.... Hellllloooooooo??????? Love, Rhonda