sobbing... at least controlably now

Just got the call from Dr. Byars's office with a number to call about financing the LAP BAND. My ins will not pay and there is 2 year waiting period for voc rehab to get gastric bypas ( which I don't want). Okay. I called very excited because we have good jobs with a good income with little debt. However, we have been through past marriages with horrible financial problems. Therefore, our credit score is not good, even though we have paid everything off and do not charge now. What is on my report is 5 years old. I must live with the ex's mistakes for 2 more years. Realistically, I know 2 years is not long, but dear Lord!!!! I have sacraficed for 5 to get things paid that had my name on it because we were married!!!! Credit bureas believe in "And God said you are one." I am literally sobbing and trying to see through the tears. Actually, the effect is pretty cool considering. It just seemed there was finally a ray of hope in my life!!!! The prospect of the weight finally coming off was so close. I did not know how important this was to me until I got turned down! I can't catch my breath. Every time I think I'm calming down the gyser blows!!!! HELP. You guys understand. I actually logged on before telling my husband. He was scared to death about it. He's calling. Talk to ya'll soon. Babette

My Heart goes out to you Babette. I don't know anything to tell you other than We keep you in our prayers. There are others out here Who've been right where you are And pushed on. Keep looking at all angles. A friend of mine out in Texas, did a "partial finance" After storing up a little "front money." If deemed medical necessity, it is tax deductible, Or so I've heard. Some will know a lot more about this, But All feel your pain. Praying good news to come around the corner for you. Best Wishes- Dx

Babette, Take Dx advice regarding the medical being deductible on your tax return. The tax code states that in particular with plastic surgery that it is only deductible if it is medically necessary. To me, even though I was a lightweight in comparison to some folks (my pre-op weight was 245), and I did have to pay for my surgery out of pocket (Individual insurance policy does not cover WLS surgery)...I am deducting all my medical expenses this year. I am a CPA and have to deal with this type of issue several times a year. If you want to talk further about this, my email address is [email protected]. Take care and may God continue to bless you. Norma

Hey sweetie, I am so sorry to hear about your set back. I wish I could fund your surgery for you, but God in His infinite wisdom deemed that I not be rich....But I will start nagging at Him to open some financial doors for you and for things to work out so that you are a healthier you. Hang in there. Sometimes when things seem the darkest, and you see a light at the end of the tunnel it is NOT a train, but a ray of hope. Smoochies & extra hugs, Arlies

Don't give up. I know it's challenging - even if you have to wait 2 years. There are people here who've had to take that route also. I also know someone *****financed their home to get the surgery, and insurance went back and paid part of it. If you are a homeowner, you could check into that. If you have no negative marks on your credit for 5 years, someone would finance that for you. Alot of big decisions to make, and I know right now you are heartbroken, but like everyone has said, don't give up. Be sure you exhaust ALL avenues before you resign yourself. And even at the risk of sounding cliche, God's timing is perfect --- pray. If it looks like it would be another 2 years before you could finance it, you may want to start the Voc Rehab process - see which one pans out first. BIG HUGS Kimberly

Babette, Kim's right, go ahead and apply for the Voc rehab. Also call your docs office and get a referal to the social worker at the hospital they are affiliated with. Social workers have great resources and maybe they can help you. Don't give up! To release the frustration, write your ex's name on your foot and stomp around saying "take this and that you jerk." It sounds funny but it does help. If you have children by him don't let them see you do it.I like to take a dry sponge and slam it against the wall, make sure it's dry or you'll have spots on the wall!!!!! Good luck , Tomanip