The way people treat you after WLS

Hey Y'all! I was just curious about how people are going to treat me after WLS. I have heard from so many people how differently you are treated after you lose the weight. From the stories I've heard, its like you are invisible when you are overweight, and then after you lose it, people discover you. I 've just heard that some people have trouble dealing with how differently they are treated as opposed to when they were overweight. I think its sad, really, you are the same person as you were when you were heavier, now you just feel better about yourself. I was just wondering if any of y'all that have had WLS have noticed any differences in the way you are treated. I guess I just am curious as to what its going to be like on the "other side". I know some people who made life difficult for me, and its going to be so much fun to let them see me as a thin, happy person and go "thanks for making me a fighter! "(as Christina Aguleria says!) TTFN Crystal P.S. If any of y'all have seen the movie "Shallow Hal" (one of my faves!) it really illustrates what I'm talking about.

Hi Chrystal Curious about the "other side" huh? YES!! People treat you different, somehow there is a huge misconception out there that fat people can not do the same jobs as skinny people. My employer makes no difference between a fat and a skinny person, it's truly an equal opportunity employer, and although I thought I was as big as a house, there are people there who are even bigger than me. They are very much qualified and very intelligent, bright people, just don't fit the image of the skinny office type, but that's okay. We are not "out there" in public, we're behind closed doors and in our job, our ABILITIES count , not our looks. I gotta say this is the FIRST job that I've ever had that I didn't feel like I needed to prove myself, they accepted my capabilities as my strength. First time I'm getting paid what I'm worth too!! Anyways, all that said, there is still the personal interaction with the folks I work with. Now every girl knows that as an obese female, men tend to overlook you. The guys would flirt with those skinny girls in the office and just politely say " hello " when they see you. I have wonderful news for you. People will start noticing you when you're losing the weight. Others will see you six months later and ask you how long you've worked there. They've never noticed you before because of the weight. This doesn't just mean the opposite sex. Females are even more critical of others and REALLY can be cruel with comments, when you lose weight, they almost react with jealousy, you're now impeding on their territory. Its funny out there. UNFORTUNATELY we can not change other people, but we know, having been there ourselves, to treat anyone overweight like they are regular people, because they ARE!! Maybe it takes us, who have been through it, to change the others out there. With the growing number of WLS'ers, soon this country will be skinny again, and we will be even better because we can recognize EVERYONE for their strenghts and talents, no matter what they look like. Let it begin with US!!! Wohoo.. I feel like I'm writing an article in the school paper again after 18 years LOL So yes, your answer is YES. They treat you better. Fairer. Friendlier. More respectful. It's a shame isn't it? ~Andie~

My cousin, who had WLS a little over a year ago has made comments to me about this. She has been married for 12 years, and her sister-in-law saw her for the first time at Thanksgiving. My cousin had lost over 100 pounds by then, and was looking good! Suddenly, the SIL - who lives in the same town - just down the road, is wanting to "do lunch" and go shopping and just generally be around her. It's disgusting! Of course my cousin can see right through it and is very hurt by it. That whole family just thought of her as a fat slob, even though her house was immaculate all the time, full dinners were always cooked, and she is just about the smartest person I know! Now they are all taking advantage of her abilities! She can sew, knit, play the piano and guitar, etc... She's very well rounded (well, not anymore! LOL) and they are just now taking notice of her. IT's a shame. I DARE - no make that DOUBLE DOG DARE - anyone to treat me that way after WLS! I'm no fool and I'll see right through it too! Sorry - just had to jump in on this one! HUGS Kimberly

YES!!! THERE IS A DIFFERENCE!! EVERYBODY HAS ADVICE / INSULTS --JUST LIKE BEFORE when I was fatter only now they are in a different direction !!! One particular teacher I work w/ is always telling me your need to wear clothes that fit, change my makeup, hair, glasses. She rarely spoke to me before WLS. I am a lower weight than her now. Her comments are not kind. I have tried to be nice and tell her that I am not investing in a lot of fitted clothes because I want to lose about 20 lbs more. I just try to remember-- people are just people. Gotta love them.

Hey Crystal, I am 6 months out. So far the only thing I have noticed is that I am getting more attention from men. When we went to Talladega guys would talk to me and flirt and I know they would not have done that before. But I'm not thin yet so I don't know if friends or anybody will treat me different or not. If they do thats there problem. I did this to feel better and be healthy and if they can't deal with the looks that comes with the package oh well....I thought that movie was really good for those of us who are overweight in how we really feel and are treated alot of the time. Becky

Well, I have always tended to not let folks pass me by. I am a talker and talk to everybody, but I am worried a bit about when I am much smaller all my guys taking me serious!!! I LOVE to flirt and know that I will need to be a bit (read ALOT) more careful not to be taken seriously! Smoochies Arlies

I've noticed differences in how people respond to me but I think it is more how I present myself now I'm thinner. I speak more confidently, use less apologetic tones and I "work the system" better than before. Things seem to go a little smoother for me now but I'm not sure if it's me or them that have changed. Elesha

Where have you been young lady????

Hi Christine, I can't wait to see you Sunday, your new snapshot pic looks so good! I hope everything is going well with you. I don't get on the boards much with the kids out of school now and my PRN work. See you Sunday, Elesha