A Southerner !

This was sent to me by Janice Lewis and I thought ya'll may enjoy it also. LOVE being Southern! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit & a conniption fit, & that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is -- as in: "Going to town, be back directly." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ All Southerners know exactly when "by & by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken & a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin'! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" & "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only a Southerner, both knows & understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, & po' white trash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, verb, or an adverb. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines. We don't do "queues," we do "lines"; and when we're "in line," we talk to everybody! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Put 100 Southerners in a room & half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Southerners never refer to one person as "y'all." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Southerners know where grits come from & how to eat them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, & coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; & that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" & "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart" & go your own way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ~~~ Bless your hearts! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, ya'll need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I aint from the South but I got here as fast as I could." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bless your hearts, y'all have a blessed day. Tammy

How true, How true! I think I'm fixin to make me some sweet tea because the fixins we had with dinner have made me right thirsty. Then I'm going to bed directly cause my 4 year old is still up and waitin on me to get to bed. If I don't do it now, he's gonna pitch one heck of a conniption fit. HUGS Kimberly

Lord have mercy! That is so true. Just gotta love them there sayings a mighty whole lot! Jane

And whatch know good? Just me and 'nanner puddin'. Love it! Smooch, Arlies

love it!!! I guess you can pretty much consider me a Southerner, but I DO have one question.. someone please explain that "by-and-by" concept? In return I can explain some of the wonderful terminology that's being used across in our neighboring state, Louisiana, where you'll hear things like " Are you gettin' down?" and "Go save the laundry" and you won't make the mistake and try to rescue a load of laundry from the washer nor start dancing like a wild crazy chick in your in-law's house Years of being around my beloved Southerners have taught me that you guys are the absolute best! God bless all y'all , your better halves and your chi'rren !! ~~Andie~~