A Moms Letter To Santa

Dear Santa: I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my two children on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my doctor, sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground and figured out how to attach nine patches onto my daughter's girl scout sash with staples and a glue gun. I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years. Here are my Christmas wishes: I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache after a day of chasing kids (in any color, except purple, which I already have). I want arms that don't flap in the breeze but are strong enough to carry a screaming toddler out of the candy aisle in the grocery store. I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month of my last pregnancy. If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like a car with fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music. It would be nice to have a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals; and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone. On the practical side, I could use a talking daughter doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with one potty-trained toddler, two kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools. I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting, "Don't eat in the living room" and 'Take your hands off your brother,' because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog. And please don't forget the Playdoh Travel Pack, the hottest stocking stuffer this year for mothers of preschoolers. It comes in three fluorescent colors and is guaranteed to crumble on any carpet making the in-laws' house seem just like mine. If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoam container. If you don't mind I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family; or if my toddler didn't look so cute sneaking downstairs to eat contraband ice cream in his pajamas at midnight. Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is ringing and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the chimney and come in and dry off by the fire so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet. Yours Always...Mom. P.S. - One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children young enough to believe in Santa.

Awww. That sounds about right. My 8 year old daughter doesnt know if she believes or not. Last year someone told her about the tooth fairy not being real and she asked me about it. I told her the truth. A couple of days later I heard her telling her dad about there not being a tooth fairy. He said "who told you that" and she said "momma". So he then says "well, what did she tell you about santa claus"....I was livid! She has doubted ever since. I told her that we used to not think there was a santa but that every year she gets presents that we didnt buy so there must be. 2 years ago she got a trampoline (which she broke her arm on 6 mos later) and my husband left ruts in the yard from his truck and we made a big deal about santas sleigh getting stuck in our yard. I reminded her of that a couple of days ago so I think she is back believing. She even told me the other night she saw Santa in the sky doing a practice run. (it was a airplane with a red light and so it must have been rudolphs nose).... They are so impressionable.... What is the appropriate age that they usually find out??? Anyone know??? I have a 13 year old step-son and he wont say whether or not he believes or not. Nobody really knows if he believes or not. He wont say. We think he thinks if he doesnt believe he doesnt get gifts. Then again he is autistic and truly may still believe. Well, I am off to Mobile Flea Market... Talk to you all later!!

Just look at you, "I am off to the Mobile Flea Market.." Next year that will be ME!!!! Santa is real....He is in our hearts...Actually he is the spirit of giving that we all have and are able to take advantage of at Christmas. So he IS REAL!!!! Smooch, Arlies

Well Miss Priss, If your going to the Flea Market.... Then I'm going too.... About Santa..... We love him. He isn't the center of our Christmas, but he is a part of it. And honestly, I don't want to think of Christmas without him. It would be like Easter without eggs. Alex still believes in him. And we do too. Well, you know what they say.... Seeing isn't Believing.... Believing is Seeing. Tammy OH PS for more great Christmas stuff, go to mymerrychristmas.com Don't forget to add the www.

I believe in Santa!!! I do, I do!!!! SMoochers, Arlies