Are you awake?

Good morning. I feel so much better this morning. I watched the nbc special last night and it really got to me. I think it was the fact that they put a face with a statistic. That man's wife was so gracious to allow us to see first hand what she is going through. I am looking forward now with a more determined attitude. I do want to be here to see my family grow old. I think I need to take with my PCP and get some crazy meds.

Unfortunatly, I am awake. I have parrots who worship the sun. They are up with it and yak yak yak yak yak yak. Even covered they still talk. My african grey is in there calling my dog, SASSSSSYYYYYYY. I am so glad you are feeling better this morning. You will be there to watch your family grow old. You dont need crazy meds, although I have heard some docs will give you crazy med before surgery to calm you down. After I found out I was going to have this surgery, I started preparing myself and my family for death (except my daughter). I didnt want her 7 year old brain worrying about me dying. But, I wrote letters to my parents, siblings, husband, best friends, and to Emily. I told my husband what to do with my life insurance money and to move to the same neiborhood as my parents so they will be closer and able to help him with Emily. I took her on a shopping spree the weekend before and took her and 2 friends to chuck-e-cheese. Its morbid but reality too... It made me feel better to know that I had a chance to say goodbye to them if anything happened. I even picked out who was going to do my eulogy at my funeral and what songs I wanted played. I know I know -- morbid.... I feel so blessed that I had this surgery and the benefits far outweighed the risks for me. I will talk to you later! Christine PS...ITS SO COLD OUTSIDE!

Things always look better in the morning.... Smooch, Arlies