So, humiliating and I wanted to cry

Friday, my husband and I went out of town to watch my oldest son play basketball. I went into the restroom just before halftime. When I came out of the stall, there were two itty bitty teenage girls standing at the sink and looking into the mirror. I guess one of them didn't care if she was rude or she just thought that even though the bathroom is small I wouldn't hear her. As I opened the door to the stall, one girl laughed a little and said "Ugggg, look at herrrrr". I pretended not to hear it but really felt like bawling my eyes out. I feel like because of my size, people never see that I am not a disgusting or ugly person, they also don't see that along with my big body, I have a big HEART. I tend to care too much. I care about my chidren's friends as if they were my own. I cry when I hear of the death of a child that I don't even know, I cry when I see a homeless person begging for food or money, I cry when I hear of the death of a friend of a friend. I am a caring person with a lot of love in my heart. BUT WILL THOSE PEOPLE EVER SEE IT??? Discrimination against a person that is heavy is just as bas as any other type of discrimination.

I'm sorry that you had to hear their comments and that they made you feel so badly. The only thing that I can tell you honey is to hold your head up high and do NOT let someone pull you down to their level. Their youth and ignorance was showing in the callous and insensitive remarks. I have so been there before. You just wish for an immense crack to open up in the floor and swallow you whole. Embarrassment, pain, humiliation.. the full gamut of emotions courses through your being and you are hurt. ((hugs)) Don't hate them and don't pity them. If you are able to (at the time) educate them. If not, keep that head up hight and proceed on just like they don't exist. I know I know it is easier said than done. Again I have SO been there before. Right now I am having to deal with folks that I have known for years that never would give me the time of day before (when I was a size 26-28) but NOW they are falling all over themselves to be nice to me (even go out of their way to be nice to me) now that I am a size 10 and almost an 8! That is very hard for me to "wrap" my head around. Part of me wants to lambast them for thinking I'm "worthy" now... and part wants to forgive and forget. It is very hard to do... Sometimes I feel like a "thin" person and sometimes I am still the "fat" girl.. weird isn't it? I wish you nothing but the best honey... keep that head held high! Elizabeth~

People are just ignorant! They just don't understand how we feel. I will never forget how embarrased I was once. My husband and I were at a big youth conference with our youth group it was in indianapolis at the astro dome with 25,000 kids and adults. We were getting ready to sit down at the big assembly and everyone was already seated. I tried to sit down and I wouldn't fit in the seat. Matt, my dh, and I had to go to another section where the seats were bigger. I was so humiliated. I just sat down and cried! My hubby was so supportive and held me as the assembly started. Everyone around me were standing up cheering and clapping and my hubby and I were just sitting there, it was as if everything was in slow motion. Now I am 217 and I have lost 71 pounds in 3 months and I know I would fit in those sits now. Keep you head high and you will be a looser soon. God bless and have a great day! Penni

For some reason, teenagers seem to feel more entitled to be rude. I guess it's just a phase. I am so sorry you had to go through that....I have a little trick I play in my head (and, even once, out loud)... I tell myself that someday these kids will be interviewing with me for a job. I remind myself that there will be a time when they are feeling vulnerable....I remind myself of all the nice, gracious young people I have helped to have successful and rewarding careers...and then I know that this callous remark is just an indicator of a future that may never be realized for them. What goes around comes around and that's how I describe it to myself.... All that said, I'll never forget the first time I went to the St. Louis ZOO. It was awhile ago and I had lost some weight - not alot but enough for me to be feeling like going to the zoo. Everyone was gathered around the new baby elephant, Raja (shows you how long ago)...a little boy in the crowd about 5 years old, pointed at me and yelled out very loudly "look mom, she's really FAT". I was very humiliated. Take care. This too shall pass.

Trust me, people like that will get there's in due time. I have no doubt that "what comes around, goes around" and there will be a time when that girl gets hers.

I have been insulted by the best of em. been moo-ed at. people have sung the "fatty fatty 2x4" song at me. i had a guy i really really desperately "loved" laugh in my face. in high school i remember a few guys following me and making rude comments. it hurt, but for the most part I turned out so much better than they did. like someone else said what comes around goes around. over my years i have learned not to let what others think about what i appear to be bother me. when it comes down to it it is who you are that counts. it has taken me a looong time to decide that i am good enough for me and anyone that wants to know me. when people are rude to me it hurts but they arent my family or friends so who cares what they think. people are rude because they need to make themselves feel better. i bet if that girl told the truth she would say that she is afraid of being fat or thinks she is fat. she has the fear. we have been there and we can overcome. my mantra is i may be fat but i can loose weight. stupid is forever. dont let em get you down. you are probably twice the person they are and no, i dont mean by weight.