scared!

My surgery is only 18 days away. In the last two weeks I have been hearing all the complications I could have. I try to drown them out but I am nervous. What if I die and can't see my kids anymore, what if I have alot of complication, what if..... I am sure everyone has the before surgery I just need some encouragment. I am worried about that day and how it will be after. Need hugs, Penni

Hey Penni, I am still pre-op but I have the same fears you describe. I do know however that this is the best choice to lead a normal life for me and my family. Doing nothing about our weight insures a shorter life being captive inside a body thats not truly living. I try not to think about the reports because they admit to not taking everything into account, such as counting all deaths (no matter how or what they died of, i.e. car wrecks, natural causes...) of WLS patients not just those associated with the surgery. Stay strong and know that life on the other side will be sooooo much better for you and your kids who will be happy having their mother more active in their lives. Love and prayers to you. Wayne

Deep cleansing breath time! (hugs) I want to tell you that it is normal (and okay) to have some trepidation before undergoing surgery. It is normal. Now if your fear is totally out of control you NEED to sit down and talk with your dr. This is a big big step and not one that should be taken lightly. You HAVE to be ready for this , body mind and soul!... Have you researched your type of surgery you are going to have? Have you thoroughly investigated everything that there is offered regarding Bariatric Surgery? The more you check things out , the more you learn... Yes you will find some horror stories. I didn't gloss over those either in my several years that it took to achieve getting my surgery. Take them in stride and take the information in that you learned and make the BEST DECISION FOR YOURSELF. If you are ready to take the step then do it. If you aren't, then hold off. YOU are the only one that can make that decision. Yes, there can be complications. There can be complications for ANYONE undergoing ANY type of surgery. Granted, we being overweight, have our own set of problems going in to having surgery. I guess what I am trying to say (and not doing a great job of it...just got up *yawn*) is that you HAVE to be ready. Don't let someone tell you that it is going to be ok and other RAH RAH GO GETTER' DONE type stuff....and don't let anyone tell you that they know "so and so's friend, mother, brother/sister that had it done and they have had NOTHING but problems..." yada yada bullcrap. MAKE THE DECISION FOR YOURSELF AFTER THOROUGHLY INVESTIGATING THINGS.... You know what is right for you.... Wishing you nothing but peace and good vibes my dear..... ((hugs)) Elizabeth~

Penni, Hang in there! I am right behind you and we will be alright. Glad I had a chance to talk to you on the phone! Remember to call if you need me! Colette

Penni, I'm just a few weeks after you, hang in there!! We will all do just fine I know that with this surgery my life is fading - in more ways than one. I have hope because with my surgery I will be able to live a normal life once again!!! Yes, it's a serious decision, but to me this leap of faith is worth it.

Penni, Listen to Elizabeth. Her answer is right on the money. Do exactly what she says. Talk to your doctor. Make sure the decision is right for you and this is the right time to do it. Read the AMA report, or at least the summary. That will give you a clearer idea of what the study found. Headlines can be scary, and they are not always based on full information. It is your decision--no one else's. You need to be comfortable with this. My husband kept reminding me that I could change my mind right up to the time they wheeled me into surgery. I didn't, and I am glad. Come back to the boards any time you need to. We are all here to support you. Linda

Penni, Take a deep breath...your in excellent hands with Dr. Hornbostel...he did my surgery in Dec. 2004. I was 550 at my highest wt. 459 at surgery and now 311...and I am pretty much bedridden, but getting better everyday, if anyone should have had complications it would have been me being so heavy and I have had none!! I think everyone has had the same thoughts, What If I Die? I think this is pretty normal to have these feelings. Have faith this is the first step towards the best years of your life. Hang in there!!! Julie

Penni, you are totally normal in feeling this way! Of course there can be complications and problems, but they are rare! Some things can be prevented just by following your surgeons orders to a T! Drink your water, get in your protein, whatever he/she says! Know that there will be pain afterwards. I had open (not lap) so I was in a world of hurt, but I survived. There are pain meds that help! I have said that I would do this surgery PLUS PAIN again every single year if that's what I had to do for these awesome results! You will be fine. Know that we all went through this. It'd be weirder if you didn't feel like this! THis is huge, but so wonderful. Your life will be much richer afterwards. Once the surgery is complete, you will REALLY need support. That is when I used this website like crazy. I had so many questions. I thought I was ready for surgery and life as a post op, but your life changes and you will be busy adjusting. It's great. It's a wonderful thing and I wouldn't take it back for anything! You are starting a whole new chapter in your life. It will be exciting, scary, and everything else rolled into one. But once you see the changing you, you'll be so happy you did it! Take care, Kristen (oh yeah, I DID move to Missouri after all! Love it here! Went back to Calif to visit and couldn't wait to get back here to Mo!!!)

Penni, I can relate to you and being scared with all thats been being said lateley.Im supposed to have surgery December 1st. I have had other abdominal surgery and with all the reports about weight loss surgery lately im scared to death. I hope everything goes well for you.

Shawney, please don't let the news reports get to you! Here's the deal, people who aren't overweight are also having to foot the bill for higher insurance rates because so many of us are having surgery. What they don't know/or care ab0out right now, is that this will help for LESS medical costs in the future, thus lowering the cost to take care of "us"---the obese/former obese....who have or will have or would have have major complication from obesity...diabetes, heart disease, etc... It's all money and people are griping. When one story hits the news, it spread like wildfire. Could you imagine if they reported all the positive stories of WLS? Holy Cow, it'd be an entire newspaper full, every day! Don't let these stories get you down. Instead, use them as tool...find out if the problem was related to the behavior of the patient in any way, and then make sure YOU are more responsible. Many times a patient will not follow the doctors orders and this causes probelms post op....dehydration, malnutrition, gall stones, etc... Take your vitamins, get in your protein, eat slowly, walk, etc. You will be fine!! I have friends who had major complications after surgery and they are STILL happy they did it and would go through it all over again, WITH complications! Take care and feel free to post questions or concrens. There are alwyas people who will offer up a shoulder to lean on throughout this process...before and AFTER surgery! Take care, Kristen M.