It's me I am still here!!

Hello all, After saying goodbye i couldnt leave.. I am struggling to much to turn away now. I am off work due to a signs of carpal tunnell not sure when i am going back however they put me on steriods and well guess what i am here 9 months after my divorce and and 2 years and 3 months out of surgery and have put on a total of 50 lbs i dont know where to turn. Depression has kicked in and I just cant pick myself up no matter how much i have tried i am scared its a good thing that i have found out where the support group is here in tulsa. I feel like i am out of control and have no friends to help me threw this.. I am up to 218 and i started out at 319. I just dont know where to go anymore i cant seem to put the willpower in and do this.. I have updated photo on profile Marsha 319/169/218

Marsha, I'm glad you're sticking around!! I wish I had some answers for you. But know that you are in my prayers! Connie

Marsha, do you still have insurance at your current job? If so, maybe you could look into therapy. Are you still at Walmart? I used to work for Walmart, and they had all kinds of special services for employees (although most people didn't really know about them). I know of a few people who used the mental health services because they were dealing with all kinds of personal problems. I believe the services are free...just ask your human resource manager. Like you, I struggle with my eating habits. I do okay with exercise, but I have binge-eating issues that are difficult to control. It's not easy! I do hope you'll be able to find some local help, maybe in a support group. You could also go to Weigh****cher's meetings for support, if you can't find WLS support. Hang in there...surely there is SOMETHING out there that will send you in the right direction. Pamela 352/238/150

Pamela, I havent been at wal-mart in over 4 months i started a new job been there over 3 month however i have been off today 2 weeks on workers comp i have carpel tunnell and will probley have to have surgery on it. Thanks for caring Marsha

Marsha, So glad your back~! We need lots and lots of people on here yapping about anything and everything because its is therapy on its own and its free~! I would say at this point it is only a minor set back, although I am sure major in your eyes, but look how far you have come. Think about all of the weight you have lost and carpall tunell is minor compared to alot of things. I had it and the surgery was a breeze. Please please keep your head up and your eyes forward and try, I know its hard, to look back. You have accomplsihed so much and to be honest your one of the many folks that made me get the surgery in the first place. I used to sit on here and read and read all of the profiles and messages and think "Damn if I could do that too" Well I did and am glad to say I am now 101lbs less, a better husband, a better father, and I think a better person. I dont think I could ask for more than that, but I am of myself, my freinds, and folks on here. I want people to see what I did and do the same for themselves. So remember you have a million eyes reading all of your posts and maybe someone will have the answer. Andy hey if ya ever wanna yap drop me an e-mail.. [email protected] I may not have the answer, but I have an ear and can listen (so to speak). Even when the sky is the darkest and the night never seems to end the daylight will shine and a brand new day will be upon us..we live for one more day to make the changes in ours and others lives.. Gevin Elder 314.5/214/146 RNY 06-01-05

Marsha Girl, I know you can do this. You did it before. First and foremost, you have to believe in yourself. You have to believe you can do this. You have to forget the past and look forward. Put one foot in front of the other and take it one day at a time, knowing that the future is going to be better. Tell yourself you are a winner, because you are. You did it before and you can do it again. I know you know what to do. Stay away from the carbs. Load up on the protein. Enjoy the good veggies, salads, tomatoes and all those great things that are in season this time of the year. Drink your water or Crystal Light. I love the GNC liquid protein. If I don't use that every day, I can really tell that I am much hungrier. I put 9 T in 24 oz of Crystal Light. That gives me 54 grams of protein and I can barely taste it in the CL. I drink this over about a 3 hour period in the mornings. It is my survival kit, really. I think I could survive on liquid protein and CL if I had to. Are you doing your vitamins? Multivitamin and B-12, don't forget them. They are really important in your survival. Here's an idea. Sit down and write out a contract with yourself about everything you are going to do every day. And then check it off every day for like a week and then do something to celebrate your success (not food!) Go on a walk downtown or in a park you like. Go window-shopping to pick out that great size 10 that you're going to get back into. The point is reward yourself with something besides food. I love lists. Maybe you do or don't. But lists are very motivational to me. I tell myself, this is what I'm going to do everyday: Take 2 multivitamins Takle 2 glucosamine-chondrotin Take one B-12 (1000 mg) Drink my liquid protein in Crystal Light every AM Eat at least two meals with primary substance being protein Drink 64 plus oz of water-Crystal Light (I really like CL to go. I keep it in my purse and use it with a free glass of water for my drink) Do 30 minutes of walking (I do water-walking) I also add in my spiritual goals like Bible Reading and prayer and then my work to do list. At the end of the day if I've done 80% of my list I consider it an accomplishment and I celebrate by watching a little TV or reading a good book. IF I haven't done everything, then I try to catch up on some of the things I need to do before I reward myself. Marsha, you were an awesome inspiration to me about this time last year when we had the picnic in Columbia. Remember you brought those pants and you got in one leg and someone else got in the other? Remember the good times. You can get back there. You have lots to give. Hang in there and keep us updated. You can do this. Really, you can because you are a winner! Teresa