Whats Happening Monday - For Jan

Dear Andrew and OH Peeps~

Hi everyone. I want to say CONGRATS to Bev and Donald for having their dates for the surgery. I remember getting my date and feeling sick to my stomach too-as Bev described. I think it was FINALLY the realization that the wait was almost over and the dream of getting the weight off was really going to happen....but then again, because I was waiting for over a yr, I kept waiting for the other shoe to fall and something to happen to ruin the dream-I guess because its something I had remembered wanting ALL of my life-you know? At any rate-the time will fly guys (ecspically Donald-since thats tomorrow-LOL) We will keep you both in our prayers, welcome you to our losers bench-polishing your places right now-and IF either of you have any ?s for us or needs to talk-this is the best place to post and get support, understanding and answers-use us-that is what we are here for and we have been there......your not thinking of anything we havent thought of, been through and can advise you on-even if you think your the only one-your not-I promise!!!

Well, things are the same here. Still miss my daughter. For whomever has asked-she IS already 17 1/2. Will be 18 in January 2009. Like I posted before-the only hope I have of NOT being financially responsible for her until she turns 18 is to have her emancipated. I dont mind helping her with food and such-Im speaking about things like her driving and getting in an accident type thing-would make me responsible and I could be sued over it cause she is under 18. (although I cant report her as a runaway, I can not MAKE her come home and I cannot put her in treatment (without a lot of red tape) because at 17 they are considered an adult. I have called numerous facilities, law and child welfare-it is what it is.

My boys are trying as hard as they can to be good and stay positive. My little guy is probably having the hardest time, due to him not understanding WHY his sissy is gone, and overheard a conversation on the phone about it not being worth slapping the crap out of her and risk losing the boys over her allegations of child abuse because she got slapped across the face last year and swore up and down she wa**** not slapped. Oh well-Jon overheard and now asks several times a day if he is going to be lost too and such - and then, his bestest buddy, Clair-who Mel and Terry were in the process of adopting-got sent back to her scum ball biological mother and Jon doesnt understand and is very upset about it. SO, he has dealt with 2 loses of persons this week (along with the rest of us) but his age keeps him from fully comprehending and so he is acting out a lot more this week.

My hubby, bless his heart-got a sitter for the boys Saturday night (my oldest daughter and hubby) and he picked me up and said he had a suprise for me. He had a duffle bag packed and a cooler and all the fixings for camping! He took me up to Stockton Lake. We got there about midnite and I wanted to go fishing first-so we were fishing and one of Mikes racing buddies was already up there. So we fished and got stuck in one of the worst storms I have ever been in the middle of-shelter or not, it was lighting and cracking and popping that makes you jump-even the guys were jumping. Well-our tent was soaked (along with all the other campers there) and a lot of people were going to the shelters at 2-3 am due to the storm. It was rough. Anyway, after the storm, Mike was just going to pack the Suburban and come on home and I asked if we could just fish a little more-I was finally relaxing and gave us a chance to talk and be alone. We just had his vacation, but no alone time whatsoever. We have a lot to talk about and catch up on and he knows I am pretty devastated over the whole thing with my daughter-which he is too-but he cant stand the thought of her putting her hands on me and he worries about what will happen next-and he just doesnt like it. I cant protect myself against her without getting in trouble-but I can call the sheriff if she ever puts her hands on me again. Anyway-it was really nice of him to do that. My heart really wasnt in it-but I appreciated what he tried to do for me.

I got excited last night because I had a call from the friend Stephanie is staying with. One missed call. No message though. I sent a message telling her that I was in the house now and when she had time to please call me back if she still needed/wanted to talk to me. In the meantime my mom calls and says she just got off the phone with Stephanie and that she thinks that she wants to try and work it out to come home. Im pretty confused right now about that-but I was glad she wanted to talk to me. I was excited. Well, I get the call from her-and the only thing she kept doing was telling me how upset she is about my oldest daughter getting into it with her and that I better tell Megan to mind her own business and that Megan told her friend that she hit me, and she didnt hit me....she physically did not HIT me. She just twisted my arm until my elbow popped trying to get her phone from me-and then just kept banging into me with her body, like ramming me-so she is right, she never HIT me-she just laid her hands ON me and bullied me. I had to correct Megan. The WHOLE conversation was how I LET Megan choke her and so on and she is thinking about pressing charges against her. I was like, Steph, "I" was the one who took Megan off you. I did NOT tell her to do it, nor did I ask her to-she didnt care-thats all she kept complaining about-so after the 5th time of me saying I would speak to my oldest daughter and tell her NOT to call her friend OR text her-no more contact with Steph whatsoever- at least 5 times of saying that, I was starting to get mad-cause she just kept on and on and on....I finally just said- Is there something "I" can personally talk to you about thats between you and I? I cant control Megan anymore than I can control you. I said I would talk to her, but thats obviously not good enough, so if you dont want to talk about anything else...(pause) She said-Ok, goodbye and hung up. I just sat and bawled. Guess I thought she was going to be happy to talk to me. Not just sit and chew on me about her older sister. She said she isnt going to stand for anyone being mean to her best friend or her best friends mom. Period. Geez, I guess thats how my oldest daughter feels about me. She knew I couldnt slap steph across the face, so when Steph started shoving her like she did me-Megan lost it and it was on.......and I always thought Megan was a sort of wussy, the way she acts and HATES any kind of confrontation......but, I tell you-she can protect herself. Steph is a good 6 inches taller and all-and it didnt matter in the end.

I just want to take a second to say thanks for everyone sending and saying prayers for us. I really appreciate you. Thanks for those who have sent me personal emails and those who have replied to my post-It means a lot to me to have your support and prayers. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I am going to get off here and go relax. I am not feeling too hot today. Feel blah, like an eeyore day here. At any rate-you are all in my thoughts and prayers. Take care and have a good day. Love, Janet

P.S. Andrew-thanks for doing the post for Jan and we are REALLY glad to see you actively on the board again-we really missed you alot.