Heres four Humors for you today

Hope these will tie you over till tomorrow lol It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was
almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her
car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car
while it warmed up and thought about her situation. She finally
remembered her daddy's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard she
should wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it. That way she would
not get stuck in a snow drift. This made her feel much better and sure
enough in a little while a snow plow went by and she started to follow it. As she followed the snow plow she was feeling very smug as they
continued and she was not having any problem with the blizzard
conditions. After an hour had passed, she was somewhat surprised when
the snowplow stopped and the driver got out and came back to her car and
signaled for her to roll down her window. The snow plow driver wanted to
know if she was all right as she had been following him for a long time.
She said that she was fine and told him of her daddy's advice to follow
a snow plow when caught in a blizzard. The driver replied that it was ok
with him and she could continue if she wanted, but he was done with the
Walmart parking lot and was going over to Sears next

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The next time you feel as if you have been in a Bull fight and the Bull has won think about this.

An American touring Spain stopped at a local restaurant following a day of sightseeing. While sipping his sangria, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"

The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!"

The American, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the hell, I'm on vacation! Bring me an order!"

The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy!"

The next morning, the American returned, placed his order, and then that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy of the day.
After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called to the waiter and said...

"These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones
I saw you serve yesterday!"

The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si senor. Sometimes the bull wins."

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A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.

The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.

The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed, exhausted.

Next morning, he wakes to find his sheep still just standing around. "Try again." he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day "shagging" the sheep and upon returning home, falls into bed, totally exhausted. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass.

"No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn

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Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to
the call. The house was very dark so the paramedic asked
Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl to hold a flashlight high over her
mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby! .
Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked.
Heidi pushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor
was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and
spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry.
The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked
the wide-eyed 3-yr old what she thought about what she
had just witnessed.
Kathleen quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there
in the first place......smack his A*S again