Who has tried everything???

I am so frustrated right now. I need your opinions and wisdom. Why are my friends and family convinced that one more diet or one more exercise program, or this thing has a money back guarantee...why not try this?!?! I just want to scream at them, (but I am a pretty timid person) when it comes to confrontation. How do I handle these types of comments??? I have been down the lap-band road for over 1 year and I am almost at a surgery date...why would I back track now?!?! I don't want to lose friends and family support, but these comments and this cavalier attitude toward me (as if I am not doing everything I can) are really getting to me. PLEASE HELP. I appreciate any and all commments. God Bless, Leah

Leah you know this is for you and not for them. How many more diets do they want you to try and to fail again and again. Sure you can probably get a lot of it off only to gain it all back and like if too short to keep doing that to your body. Yo yoing is hard on the body more so than just getting fat and staying that way. I had a daughter and a brother both that were very much agaist me having surgery and my daughter says if you just diet and exercise you can get it off that is what i am going to do. Well she started the diet before i had surgery and lost about 45 pounds but she is already starting to put it back on. I told her the other day see that is why i got tired of doing that over and over again. plus I feel so much better i dont feel like the same person i waas a year ago. Bless you sweetie hang on to what you believe and what is good for you , they wont and dont live your life for you. Jan

Sweetheart I know what you are going thru, I finely just let them talk and just nod my head, I had a friend in texas that called every night when time got close, I would just say ok or what ever they wanted to hear, and my daughter was against it from beginning, so just hang in there and nod your head and say ok...lol.....they just dont realize how much better you will feel, they will be right beside you when time comes..I will be praying for you.....vesta

Leah.....I am sure there is a big percent of the people on the board that had someone around them that wasn't as supportive of their decission as they would have like them to have been....I put off my decission to have my surgery for several years because of my mom and my oldest daughter. They were terrified for me to have it done. But they know I have read up on it for a good while now and that my wieght is really getting me down. I am so thankful now that all my family and all my friends are supportive of me having it now.... If I were you I would tell all of them that you have tried the diet route and it has not worked for you....And that this is a major decision for you and it would be great if they would try harder to be more supportive of your decission. This decission will change your life so much and your health as well. If you still don't have the support that you need from them then I would tell them you would appreciate them keep their thoughts to themselves!!! If this is a decision you are dertemined to stand by then keep your chin up and drop in here on the board. You will find tons of support here.....Everyone is always so great at listening, supporting and caring!!!!! I am absolutely tickled that I found this board....I have made so many friends and gotten so much praise and support that I don't even know words to say to describe how it makes me feel...... I will keep you in my prayers. I hope you find the support from these people that obivisouly mean so much to you. And I wish you all the best with your journey if that is what you decide on....Have a great weekend.....God Bless....Hugs...Tammy H.

Dear Leah, Oh girl, I know...I know. You would THINK that the people who have been around you forever and KNOW firsthand how you suffer because of your weight and how it gets you down and how it keeps you from being productive would be right there to support your decision-right? Well.....I guess it happens for some, but I lost the 3 best friends I THOUGHT I had, because they flat out told me that they would not and could not support MY decision to have WLS-they went as far as to tell me horror stories, then told me IF I would just love myself-life would be better AND they told me that I WAS BEING Selfish and NOT thinking about my hubby or kids...that was it for me. That was Oct 2005 and I have only spoken to them once since-when they called me last July to see if they could come out and swim in my pool....and guess what? What I lost with them, was returned to me 10-fold by the wonderful support I have found here~ Maybe you need to come straight out and tell them what you WANT and NEED from them as your support people-and IF they cannot support you, but still want to be a part of your life-then the subject of the lap band is NOT to be brought up, unless it is a postive conversation, because girl-you dont need that mental anguish over your head or the stress of people NOT being supportive before your surgery-and as far as support goes-come and post any time-we will be more than happy to fill their shoes and be your support- A LOT of people talk out of ignorance-or because they havent been in our shoes-so let it go-and put yourself FIRST....You did that when you made the decision to better your life-and negative people dont need or have any place in your support system.....If they are treating you like that, maybe its time to step back and evaluate where their place is in your support team-I know its hard, trust me, I cried and cried over those 3 people-and WHAM....I found this site and have met some of the best friends I have ever had-AND a lot I havent personally met yet-but know like we have been friends all our lives- Good luck to you, Leah-I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and any time you need support or encouragement-please let us know and dont let them get you down-you are the road to a better you and I dont even know you-but I am so happy for you and I am proud of you for making the decision and for caring enough about yourself to want a better life-your a strong person (stronger than you think) and you will be great and when its all said and done-I hope to hear you say LOOK AT ME NOW~I did this WITHOUT YOUR SUPPORT....you can do it- All my love, Janet

Leah, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I think friends and especially family are scared that something might happen to you. Sometimes they are a little jealous of your decision. You KNOW that one more diet or exercise plan or pill is NOT going to fix your weight problem - you don't really have to convince them. Just know in your heart that you have made the best possible decision for yourself and just let them talk. Personally, when I told people I was having the surgery I said I have made this decision and I really don't want to hear negative things about it. My co-workers were so great, they held their tongues even when I know it was hard for them. I have no family to speak of, just DD and DH and DH was totally supportive - he knows when I have made up my mind nothing stands in my way - and DD is still a little touchy about it mostly because I'm getting pretty close to goal and she thinks I may be too thin!!! I think you got excellent advice already but wanted to tell you I'm thinking of you and I will try to come see you when you have surgery. Let me know. Do you have an angel? Hugs, Lana