Joke:::::

>AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES- These really do work > > 1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a Cup of >boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will be Almost >instantly removed. > > > >2 Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by Getting >someone else to hold them while you chop away. > > > >3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by Simply >using the sink. > > > >4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and Bleed for a >few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a >timer. > > > >5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from >rolling >over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze Button. > > > >6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then You will >be afraid to cough. > > > >7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you Will forget >about the toothache. > > > > > >8 . Sometimes we just need to remember what the rules of life really Are: * >You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. > >* If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. > >* If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct >tape. > > > >Remember: > * Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. > > * Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom. >