Giving up
Marsha & Connie...sounds like we are not alone and that this issue is not all that uncommon at this stage of our journey!! So definitely don't be embarrased or ashamed but embrace the awesome support I see given on these boards daily!!
Kelly, I am intrigued by your comment to get in to see the surgeon and/or nurse. Not a bad idea but also curious what it is they could do other than reiterate what we already know we should be doing...eating better and getting more exercise. It's all just so darn easy to talk about but so terribly difficult to make ourselves do it.
((hugs)) to all who are struggling right now...
Kelly, I am intrigued by your comment to get in to see the surgeon and/or nurse. Not a bad idea but also curious what it is they could do other than reiterate what we already know we should be doing...eating better and getting more exercise. It's all just so darn easy to talk about but so terribly difficult to make ourselves do it.
((hugs)) to all who are struggling right now...
Began my journey in 2008 at 246#....lost 111#...have regaind about 35#'s of which I am currently trying to rectify!
(deactivated member)
on 9/29/10 5:07 am - Clear Lake, MN
on 9/29/10 5:07 am - Clear Lake, MN
What turned me around was going to coffee supoort group in Eagan, and going in and seeing my nurse and Bariatric Dr. I too felt like a failure, but was reasurred I wasn't......They helped me get back on track, helped me get back to exercise, reminded me about my journey, etc....It really did help.....And my peep's at coffee supoort, well they are just wonderful......
Most peep's do gain back 10-20%......So my surgeon told me that I was still a success in his book, but wanted to get me back on track and stop the grazing, and get in exercise.....I'm hooked now on the exercise, love the results I'm seeing, and am getting some WOW moments back after not having any for awhile......
Hang in there.....But yes, Go back and see the nurse or Doctor.....Kelly
Most peep's do gain back 10-20%......So my surgeon told me that I was still a success in his book, but wanted to get me back on track and stop the grazing, and get in exercise.....I'm hooked now on the exercise, love the results I'm seeing, and am getting some WOW moments back after not having any for awhile......
Hang in there.....But yes, Go back and see the nurse or Doctor.....Kelly
Here's my two cents, and please don't take this as me claiming I don't have many of the same issues, because I do. I just don't allow them to defeat my ultimate goal of living my post WLS life to the fullest.
A) My butterfly tattoo on my hand. Sappy, sure - but when I know I'm off track, I look at that butterfly and remind myself that I did this for the rest of my life. And therefore I need to HONOR MY TOOL for the rest of my life. It's daunting to think of it that way, but it is what it is. Our tools are still in place, ready to help us control our weight. But you have to have some ever-present reminder that it's about choices. That's what my butterfly does for me. (pic is in my profile for anyone who doesn't know what I'm talking about...)
B) Stress seems to feed itself. Food used to be our means of soothing our stressed selves. But we can't do that now, because the food itself causes stress! We eat something nasty because the water heater broke, which whch causes guilt, which causes shame, which causes MORE stress, which causes more poor food choices, which causes... well, you get the picture. Downward spiral. YOU HAVE TO BREAK THAT SPIRAL. Once you beat the destructive urge to eat something evil, you have a spark! A flash of hope! And if you really focus on that POSITIVE feeling, you can create MORE positive moments and start that spiral in an upwards motion! You do that for a few days, not that it's easy, but you do it - and then you step on your scale and see 'HOLY CRAP! I CAN STILL LOSE WEIGHT!!!' Build on the positive moments in your journey, nip the negative ones in the bud.
3) Exercise. This is the most difficult component for me - I'm not a slug, I rarely ever watch tv, I'm constantly doing something. But I have very little experience with formal exercise, other than walking. I simply do not have it in the budget to join a gym, and there truly are not enough hours in the day to get everything done that needs doing. I don't care who thinks I'm making excuses, it's MY truth. BUT - when I DO make a conscious effort to exercise, guess what? I FEEL GOOD ABOUT IT!!! There goes more energy into that upward POSITIVE spiral I want to create!
Bottom line is, it's all about decisions. Life will hand us crappy moments that lead us to make bad choices, and we HAVE to be able to forgive ourselves if we're ever going to get back on track and make GOOD choices again. So Marsha, Marsha, Marsha, FORGIVE yourself. And take every opportunity to make choices that work WITH your tool, rather than against it.
YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE, AND I WON'T LET YOU GIVE UP!!!
A) My butterfly tattoo on my hand. Sappy, sure - but when I know I'm off track, I look at that butterfly and remind myself that I did this for the rest of my life. And therefore I need to HONOR MY TOOL for the rest of my life. It's daunting to think of it that way, but it is what it is. Our tools are still in place, ready to help us control our weight. But you have to have some ever-present reminder that it's about choices. That's what my butterfly does for me. (pic is in my profile for anyone who doesn't know what I'm talking about...)
B) Stress seems to feed itself. Food used to be our means of soothing our stressed selves. But we can't do that now, because the food itself causes stress! We eat something nasty because the water heater broke, which whch causes guilt, which causes shame, which causes MORE stress, which causes more poor food choices, which causes... well, you get the picture. Downward spiral. YOU HAVE TO BREAK THAT SPIRAL. Once you beat the destructive urge to eat something evil, you have a spark! A flash of hope! And if you really focus on that POSITIVE feeling, you can create MORE positive moments and start that spiral in an upwards motion! You do that for a few days, not that it's easy, but you do it - and then you step on your scale and see 'HOLY CRAP! I CAN STILL LOSE WEIGHT!!!' Build on the positive moments in your journey, nip the negative ones in the bud.
3) Exercise. This is the most difficult component for me - I'm not a slug, I rarely ever watch tv, I'm constantly doing something. But I have very little experience with formal exercise, other than walking. I simply do not have it in the budget to join a gym, and there truly are not enough hours in the day to get everything done that needs doing. I don't care who thinks I'm making excuses, it's MY truth. BUT - when I DO make a conscious effort to exercise, guess what? I FEEL GOOD ABOUT IT!!! There goes more energy into that upward POSITIVE spiral I want to create!
Bottom line is, it's all about decisions. Life will hand us crappy moments that lead us to make bad choices, and we HAVE to be able to forgive ourselves if we're ever going to get back on track and make GOOD choices again. So Marsha, Marsha, Marsha, FORGIVE yourself. And take every opportunity to make choices that work WITH your tool, rather than against it.
YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE, AND I WON'T LET YOU GIVE UP!!!
Imperfect does not = unsuccessful
I am pretty early out, so I haven't faced the same things you have. However, one thing that sticks in my mind is from doing the liquid diet before and after my surgery, particularly before. That was so hard for me, I really felt hungry and tired, but I DID IT! I remember thinking that being hungry didn't kill me, that I could survive it. That was a revelation to me, because I never let myself get hungry in the past.
So now, if I feel hungry, I remind myself that I can handle it--it won't kill me, it will make me stronger.
Maybe it's just a little thing, but if you can remember that feeling, maybe it will be one of the little things that adds up for you.
Hang in there and know that we are all rooting for you!!
So now, if I feel hungry, I remind myself that I can handle it--it won't kill me, it will make me stronger.
Maybe it's just a little thing, but if you can remember that feeling, maybe it will be one of the little things that adds up for you.
Hang in there and know that we are all rooting for you!!
Marsha,
I am also struggling, and was also 3 years out in June. I am feeling negative things again, that I thought I had put behind me. For the first two years, I was a model patient and lost 187 pounds. I have been to some groups and it was easier to do that when they were in Burnsville. I am not sure why, but it really came pretty easy to me. I was eating exactly what I was supposed to and exercising regularily. I was beginning to think I had really changed my life for the better.
Then in the summer of 2009, I plopped down in exhaustion and really have not gotten back up since. I work full time with an additional part time job. I work about 60 hours a week. My husband has been physically disabled since 1999, so I have had to pick up the slack. My parents live with me and they both have been dealing with health problems. My only child is a senior this year. I have had 3 deaths in the month of September.
Life is stressful for all of us. I just don't know how to pull myself out. I met with my doctor, which I really encourage you to do, because some of my levels (vitamin D) were so off, I needed to be put on a prescription. I also scheduled with the nutrionist and met with her once and then was supposed to begin a food journal and revisit both the doctor and nutritionist. Around this time, my father-in-law was in the final stages of cancer and so appointments were cancelled and so far, I have not rescheduled them.
If there are people with similar issues in the south metro, I would love to try to get together for a group specifically on how to get back on track. Sundays would work best, because I work all of the other days of the week.
I have never felt the need for support more in my life and would really LOVE to talk with people who are in the same boat.
Thank you so much to anyone who took the time to read this.
I am also struggling, and was also 3 years out in June. I am feeling negative things again, that I thought I had put behind me. For the first two years, I was a model patient and lost 187 pounds. I have been to some groups and it was easier to do that when they were in Burnsville. I am not sure why, but it really came pretty easy to me. I was eating exactly what I was supposed to and exercising regularily. I was beginning to think I had really changed my life for the better.
Then in the summer of 2009, I plopped down in exhaustion and really have not gotten back up since. I work full time with an additional part time job. I work about 60 hours a week. My husband has been physically disabled since 1999, so I have had to pick up the slack. My parents live with me and they both have been dealing with health problems. My only child is a senior this year. I have had 3 deaths in the month of September.
Life is stressful for all of us. I just don't know how to pull myself out. I met with my doctor, which I really encourage you to do, because some of my levels (vitamin D) were so off, I needed to be put on a prescription. I also scheduled with the nutrionist and met with her once and then was supposed to begin a food journal and revisit both the doctor and nutritionist. Around this time, my father-in-law was in the final stages of cancer and so appointments were cancelled and so far, I have not rescheduled them.
If there are people with similar issues in the south metro, I would love to try to get together for a group specifically on how to get back on track. Sundays would work best, because I work all of the other days of the week.
I have never felt the need for support more in my life and would really LOVE to talk with people who are in the same boat.
Thank you so much to anyone who took the time to read this.
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