Support

I have noticed, over the past 3 years, how people come and go.  Here on OH, at PNC support groups, and at coffee.  Everyone is all gung-ho at the beginning, looking to pick brains for advice, support, encouragement, and information.  Can't get enough support!!!

Eventually, a lot of the people I've met kind of fade away - stop posting, stop attending support, stop coming to coffee... and it seems that in many cases, you just never hear from them again, unless they find themselves struggling - gaining weight, not following rules, discovering that maintaining is WAY more difficult than losing. 

Some come back, because they don't want to forfeit what they've gained from WLS. They seek support, and share their struggles - and it's a GOOD thing!  It's good for THEM, it's good for EVERYONE to learn about their struggles - try to figure how to prevent them, and to support this new 'oldie' in his or her battle to get back on track. 

My point?  Don't put all your WLS eggs in one basket.  If you're reading this and participating here, EXCELLENT!  But don't rely on OH alone.  Find a formal support group meeting to attend, and ATTEND IT.  REGULARLY.  Go to a coffee get-together, and get to know some people - MAKE FRIENDS!  You'll never find a less judgemental, wonderful community of like-minded people ANYWHERE!

Then when you DO struggle, whether it's with your WLS, or something of a more personal nature, you will find yourself surrounded with people who genuinely CARE about you, and WANT to be your shoulder to lean on.  Who help you get through whatever it is that you're facing.

So if you don't mind, I just want to give a shout out to MY peeps.  You know who you are.  I've never been wanting for friends in my life, but I've NEVER had BETTER friends.  I thank GOD for blessing me so. 

You make some VERY good points, Darla.  I think we got here by ourselves and we need others to help us get and stay healthier.  Why do it the hard way?  No one understands the issues like we do.  I remember thinking about my NUT - she is knowledgable in the book sense, but for living with it  - I need others input, too.  And I like my in-person formal support at the surgery center plus my coffee gals and all of the ones on here.  Lots of people that make my days easier, sometimes bearable!

I soooo understand what you are saying about looking for friends, here we have them and they are true and with a BIG thing in common.  I feel fortunate to have come across this site, which led me to the groups and all.  Yahooooo!

I love you Darla Lou..............................

I think this is meant for me!  Thanks Darla for the great advice.  I have yet to attend a support group or coffee.  I will for sure seek out a group.  Thanks again!

I attend two support groups in town a month. The one group I did not have my surgery through- their meetings are more geared to the after surgery but ALL are welcome with open arms and supported. There is always someone new going through what we have.
The other group is my group (WLS) and it seems to be more geared to the before. Again ALL are welcomed. I go to this group mainly to support the other people who are starting out/post op etc...
On OH I give shouts out to whoever needs/wants advice and sometimes to those that need a good swift kick LOL
That is how I roll
Kelly/tink
p.s when passing through or spending a weekend in cities- I would love to do a coffee, seems I never land on one of those weekends. hint will be around Memorial weekend lol

Darla,
Very good points. I see the coffee times posted for the cities area and was wondering if there is anyone around the Park Rapids/Bemidji area that would like to get together? If so, please let me know!

Linda

Very well said Darla.  I've found this to be true in both the Big Beautiful Women groups I belonged to and with the bariatric community.  Some people come while they're going through their journey...use what they need to reach their goal and then move on for whatever reason.  Then there are those that faithfully attend because they didn't forget the committment they made to themselves before the surgery...to make it a life long journey.  People make friends in their groups, it's natural because we're in the same boat.  But at some point, you realize...hey, the only thing I had in common with this person is that we were fat together, or had WLS at the same time.  Then there are times where your journey connects you with people who you'll bond with for a very long time, someone who goes beyond just having WLS in common.  That's a very special friendship.  I have one friend, who's remained my friend after I "took the easy way out" and had WLS, and I have made wonderful life long friends who'll continue to be my friends, not just because we had WLS together, but because we connected on a different level.   OMG, I totally lost my train of thought and where I was going with this!  Darnnit!!  Okay, go to support groups, coffee groups, play nice, and ah, talk amongst yourselves! 

You so get it, Edi - I WUV YOU!!!

Hello Darla.....thank you...I do need to quit hiding out. I need to get back on track and even more back with my friends!!

Thanks for the good advice!!!

Miss you....hugs....connie d

Geeeezzzz, waiting for this site is like having dial-up! Anyone else's slow?

Anyway, GREAT post Miss Darla! Just about every Saturday morning I think about all of you guys in MG and in St Cloud. Life just keeps happening, I guess even if I can connect for a half hour it would be better than no connection at all!

Speaking of Saturdays, is it MG this weekend?