Misconceptions....

Hello again everyone....

I just wanted to write this to see if any of you have run up against this before...

I have a friend (well, more of an acquaintance) on facebook who posted this yesterday:

why is their surgeries for overweight people to get skinny quick, but the people who aren't "overweight" have to work their butts off to get skinny? Somethings screwed up here!!

When I read this, I just got angry.... I didn't say anything to her, as I don't want to get into it with her (she tends to rub me the wrong way anyway) but have you had the problem that people think this surgery is the "easy" way out? And if so, how to you respond to people like this without snapping at them?  I mean, I know I have had to work very hard to get to this place, and if I didn't think that surgery was the only way that I could lose the weight and keep it off- I wouldn't do it!

I just wanted to see what everyone else thought.....

Dharma

Hi Dharma, I've had more than one person (including my husband) who told me surgery was "the easy way out". There is no way that this is the case for all the stuff we have to go through (liquid diet, etc., etc., etc.!)!

Lynn

I always like the "Well I did it by myself" comments... meaning without the help of surgery. I'm proud of them... but that doesn't belittle the TONS of effort I've put in.

I suppose you can tell her to gain another 100 pounds and then she could have the surgery too.

I'm pretty sure we've all come up against that pathetic mentality at some point or another...  Maybe we even felt that way about WLS ourselves at some point, preventing us from going through it sooner!  (Ya know, the #1 regret of people who have had WLS is that they DIDN'T do it sooner!  I'm guessing, but yeah - #1 regret.)

Your post reminded me of one of mine from a year and a half ago.  Feel free to read it if you want some perspective...  http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/MN/3633332/I-MUST-be-PMSin g-long/

I've always been a big believer in taking the "high road" - trying not to stoop to the level of people who are either ignorant or mean.  I don't always succeed, but I think it's much classier to just not comment at all!  (though sometimes one is sorely tempted!).  I guess I've always liked the old advertisement (back in the day) that said:  THE BEST REVENGE IS LIVING WELL.   I hope I show, by the way I live, I am the better person!!!
  You are doing just great - just keep doing what will make you even healthier and better!!!

I wonder too how many people who have that mindset have ever been labeled "morbidly obese"  or even "obese" for that matter.   Their are things in our lives that they will never understand just as there are things in their lives that we could never understand.  You took a giant step towards living your life to the fullest, don't let anyone bring you down!

Dharma:

People said stupid things like that to me both before and after surgery.  I managed to take the high road and not snap back at them, all the while visualizing my imagined delight at giving them a good close proximity mooning with my soon-to-be-skinny butt.

RP

 It is a proven fact, people can be counted on to say stupid things!  It is an unavoidable nuisance in life.  It does remind me to watch what I say to other people.

People have said some real doosies to me during my divorce years ago and my difficult pregnancies or my parents and sisters cancer.  They just can't seem to help themselves.

It's really hard to turn the other cheek and be the "bigger" person, no pun intended.  but in most cases these are uneducated people and they simply can't be taught.

I know I'll run into this as well and it's already stressed me out, but we just have to live and let live I guess.  Big hugs to you and don't let the *******s get you down!

Tess

Good for you for not replying, I wouldn't either.

I always get freaked out when the topic of higher insurance costs come up at work. I feel like I am partly to blame with my $42,000 surgery for the increase in rates, etc.