Need Something

I need something, Not sure if it is a kick in the butt or a hug but lately I have felt like crying and just plain bummed about my weight lose.... I am 5'2" at 150 ( size 10 - 12 )  which I have been at for about 9 months ( I am 21 months out ) According to charts I am just below the overweight  
I had actually gotten close to 140 but only stayed there about 2 months before I leveled out at 150.... For the most part I thought I was doing well... I follow my plan, eat my protein first, small portions,  I do lack at getting enough water....  But I had set a personal goal of 135 and settled for 150 so lately I feel like I let myself down..... It is odd, even if I spend weeks excersising I still stay right about 150.... Then I go a week or two where I do not excersise and do not gain so I think what the heck...... I have days that I say going from 225 to 150 is great and why am I upset, but then I have days like today and say I could have and should have done better...... Is it petty to want to loose another 15 lbs.... will it make me happy? I don't know, but where I use to think I was proud of where I am, just isn't the same lately......

Advice or comments welcome please...

it's not petty, Cheri - it's NORMAL.  We spent the majority of our lives focused on that damn number on the scale, it's HARD to not give it the power to judge us.

But your BODY can't read the number on that scale.  It kinda seems it might LIKE being 150, doesn't it?  Maybe that's whats right for you - I'm not saying you should give up on ever losing more, this is a lifelong journey.  But like a certain spitfire of a nurse facilitator used to remind us, our BONES are like lead pipes after carrying around so much excess weight for so long!  We WEIGH MORE than we LOOK like we do.  People are sometimes nothing short of SHOCKED when I tell them I'm still over 200! 

You are a beautiful woman.  You are WAY healthier than you were at 225!  You have this tool for the rest of your life, and as long as you respect it, you'll maintain. 

And I shared this with someone else today - remember that happiness isn't getting what you want, it's wanting what you have.  Learn to be happy with where you are!  

Thank you for this post Cheri.....Our paths are almost identicle!   You took the words right out of my mouth!  
Darla-  You are so wise!  Thank you for your words!   Love what you said!   

 Darla is right - our bodies are blind to the number on the scale!

Let me ask, when were you last at this magical number?  Beacuase I know what used to be my magic number won't work this time.  I'm older, I've had 2 children etc.  I just have decided that my body would tell me what it is.  I'll let you know when I get there.

Try and love yourself at 150 with a casual eye at 140 and be happy in between.  I know it's easier said than done.  Congratulate yourself on the weight you've already lost and feel good about that.  Then, just keep working towards the goal by more exercise/less food etc, whatever it takes.

I hope that isn't too rambling, not off pain meds yet!

Tess

I too have been struggling with this. I got down to 145 and that was great, then I gained a few back and thought oh well 150 is good too. After a VERY stressful year I am about 168 right now. I am scared to death because I don't want to gain any more. I also know that I was eating to stuff my emotions but I am working on that! I think the most disappointing thing is I am still considered obese according to the "normal" weight for my height. I didn't loose 100+ pounds to still be considered obese. I guess it's nice to know I am not alone with the feelings I have been having.

Thank You all for the comments!  Darla You always know what to say   I miss seeing you at PNC support- I have not been able to make it there in ages- I live an hour away and by the time I get off work it is too late to drive in to St Louis Park... that could be part of my bumming, I no longer meet with anyone that has had the surgery I really want to find some local support or try to get to a Saturday coffee even if I do need to drive into the cities...

The  last time I was 150 was in High School, so really I should be happy that it has been 20 years and I am back to this weight, but then on another note I was the heavy girl in High School too....

You are all right this is a life long journey and I signed up for the long haul! I think I may just have cabin -fever and need to cheer up - lol

Thanks again gals!!!!