???LOSS OF WILL???

I am finding that as the days go by I am questioning my desire for surgery.......I know I need this and want this badly, however I was recently reminded by my mother(she doesn't think I should have surgery) how much I will "miss" eating all the good things there are......and it makes me angry and sad and confused and determined all at the same time.....has anyone else experienced these types of feelings??? 

What you are feeling is normal!  If you didn't have any doubts or questions we would be worried about you.  As for "missing" things- there are very few things you will never be able to have, most things can be eaten in moderation once you are out far enough. 

Just make sure you go into your process with your eyes wide open and your head on straight.

Good Luck!

i had those same feelings at first but i would rather be healthy and live longer than eat a whole cake again.  plus its not like you wont be able to eat again your portions will change and but don't get the surgery unless u are ready because if ur not it will be harder to maintain.  that's why i am waiting longer to have it done.  baby steps is my new moto.  u will find the answers u need and u will make the right choice for urself.  good luck to u

Your feelings are very normally. However, I have to say look at all the things you have eaten in your past and how has it made you feel today? I'm almost 2 years out from surgery and I find that I can eat almost anything. There are things that I just choose not to eat to keep the weight off and to ensure that I don't feel icky after eating something. Are their things that I miss from before surgery sure I do but, let me tell you life is so much better now that those foods just don't even matter anymore. Its now about my health and being around for my family longer and not about food!  You have to make a decision that is right for you and your future.

My mother was against the surgery in the beginning but certainly has come around with my success. She shares the same feelings with me now that its the best decision I have ever made.

I wish you all the best as you decide what is right for you!

Your feelings are totally normal.  I had them too.  I still miss sitting down and eating a big meal, but the weight loss and being healthy is so worth it.

Remember that some day your body may level out and you can eat certain foods again that your mother says you'll "miss"... Although in a much smaller limited quanity. What you need to do is not let anyone else make the decision for you. Its a personal life changing decision that you need to make on your own. I think of it as my transformation, my health, my body, my life. Luckily I had supportive parents and siblings and friends. However, I did it for myself.. not for anyone else. And I didn't let anyone who nay-sayed it change my decision for me.

And its very natural to go through a food mourning process. I think almost all of us did. Even if your surgeon doesn't require it, I'd do a pre-op liquid diet. It helped me kick my caffeine, carb, and sugar habit before surgery.. Now I find a sugar free popsicle a treat!

I mourned before surgery and at times I mourn for food even 6 weeks post-op. For instance, yesterday we helped some friends on Burnsville move to Bloomington.  Where did we go for dinner? Cheesecake Factory.  Fate is so cruel.  We would have never gone there before surgery when I could have had some cheesecake and enjoyed yummy yummy food... but nooo we go after and I can only eat half of my club sandwich (okay, well, i ate the chicken and bacon out of it pretty much!) and asked for NO french fries (avoiding the temptation).  I wasn't pissed off but I was annoyed.  My husband bought Klondike bars last week (they were 3 packs for $9.99 so he couldn't turn it down he says) but it was something we would have NEVER bought pre-surgery.  There are many things I notice that he will buy that we would not have bought before my surgery.

There are times where I see what other people are and can eat and I get somewhat sad.  But then I remember that I had the surgery for a reason and that, in the future, I will still be able to enjoy some things but at a much much smaller quantity than in the past!  I've found that now I only need 1 or 2 bites to enjoy some foods. 

Thank you all so much!!!!  I am having WLS, I just have a very hard time with my mother, she has always made me feel like I am a constant disappointment, I think I will always have that need to please her.....Yeah for therapy!  She has never gotten "excited" for anything I choose to do, and always assumes I will fail miserably at pretty much anything I do.......HMMM wonder where my self esteem issues come from????  LOL

Anyway enough of the rant..........I am on day 3 of the liquid diet........and I cheated today........before I saw all your wonderful messages of encouragement.......I ate 6 taquitos........THERE, now it is out there..........I feel angry with myself for doing it.....and vow to not take another bite of solid food for .......5 weeks and 2 days.........that is when I can start my solid foods post op........

I think I need to update my GOALS>>>>>>>

Don't think of how you're going to eat or not eat after surgery. It's a totally different ballgame - you're not hungry. You don't want food. Focus on your GOAL. The only way to get your goal is to lose weight before surgery. You can definitely do this. We ALL have been where you are. The liquid diet was almost tougher than any part of the rest of the process for me. You CAN have enough willpower to get you through the next couple of weeks.