LOVE is a verb...
I meant to post this a long time ago when I read 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. The whole book is absolutely amazing, but I think this part speaks to a lot of people who may be struggling with their relationship after WLS. The writer, Stephen, talks about a seminar he was at when a man asked him about love.
“Stephen, I like what you're saying. But every situation is so different. Look at my marriage. I'm really worried. My wife and I just don't have the same feelings for each other we used to have. I guess I just don't love her anymore and she doesn't love me. What can I do?" the man asked.
“The feeling isn't there anymore?" Stephen asked.
“That's right," he reaffirmed. “And we have three children we're really concerned about. What do you suggest?"
"Love her," Stephen replied.
“I told you, the feeling just isn't there anymore," the man said.
“Love her."
“You don't understand. The feeling of love just isn't there," the man said again.
“Then love her. If the feeling isn't there, that's a good reason to love her."
“But how do you love when you don't love?"
“My friend, love is a verb. Love — the feeling — is a fruit of love the verb. So love her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?"
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That just really hit home: "Love is a verb. Love — the feeling — is a fruit of love the verb"
It makes sense that if you don't feel love. LOVE them.. do the ACTION of love... and you may just feel the love. I think that's powerful.
“Stephen, I like what you're saying. But every situation is so different. Look at my marriage. I'm really worried. My wife and I just don't have the same feelings for each other we used to have. I guess I just don't love her anymore and she doesn't love me. What can I do?" the man asked.
“The feeling isn't there anymore?" Stephen asked.
“That's right," he reaffirmed. “And we have three children we're really concerned about. What do you suggest?"
"Love her," Stephen replied.
“I told you, the feeling just isn't there anymore," the man said.
“Love her."
“You don't understand. The feeling of love just isn't there," the man said again.
“Then love her. If the feeling isn't there, that's a good reason to love her."
“But how do you love when you don't love?"
“My friend, love is a verb. Love — the feeling — is a fruit of love the verb. So love her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?"
------
That just really hit home: "Love is a verb. Love — the feeling — is a fruit of love the verb"
It makes sense that if you don't feel love. LOVE them.. do the ACTION of love... and you may just feel the love. I think that's powerful.
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