A troubling "inspirational quote"

For whatever reason, I've been into some websites recently that offer up a plethora of "inspirational quotes".

Some of them are quite profound, others are quite ridiculous. 

The following, found under the heading of "obesity", was really bothersome to me -

~ The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. ~   Helen Rowland 

Is that true?  Are we that shallow and self centered that we are EXCITED by the discovery of women who are fatter than we are?  Normally, I embrace my inner *****  But I do NOT want to be the kind of person who inspired this quote.

Sad thing is, if I'm going to be honest, there's a certain amount of truth to it, even today.  Only I wouldn't use the word "excitement", I'd use the word "RELIEF".  For the vast majority of my life, I WAS the fattest person in whatever setting I was in, be it school, church, a bowling alley, you name it.  I was the 'fatter woman' that may have excited other women.  Well, at least if there's truth in the quote.  Now, I feel relieved for myself, when I see other people (not just women) who are larger than I am.  And sad for them. 

I hope that doesn't make me a bad person... I just wish EVERYONE who struggles with their weight could find THEIR answer, THEIR solution.  WLS sure seems to have been good to me, I can't complain.

Unfortunately I think there is a lot of truth in that quote, although on one level it reduces depth of  women to being concerned chiefly about weight.  Like you, I was often the fattest woman in the room, so it is sometimes a relief to not be that any more.  But, I feel sadness for women (and men) still enduring morbid obesity.  It is often said that women are our own and each other's worst enemy and I think that can be true.  Women can be so catty to other women in ways that men are not, especially in the workplace or social situations.  In our culture, fat women are ignored and/or ridiculed.  Women can be so cruel to each other at times because of the pressure we endure in our culture, and because of the insecurity that the pressure causes.  However, when we become aware of what we are doing and how it makes us (and others) feel, I think we can also be one another's best support.  For me, I think it's all about realizing that we're all much more alike than we're different.  It's easy to be critical of someone you see as very diffent, but when we start to see that we're all basically alike with a few personality differences it's much harder to be critical.  It's been a journey for me, that's for sure.

On Mother's Day my in-laws and I went to a buffet brunch.  When there we saw a lady that I graduated with (My husband and I graduated together as well) and he made the comment - "boy, that must make you feel good" and I was like what? And he said your not the biggest in our class anymore.  I took offense to the comment and told him so - he's just not sympathetic when it comes to obese people and he's never had an issue.  But I didn't get what he was saying at first because I never looked at her and felt relief that she was now bigger than I was - I honestly felt bad because I've been there and done that.  My heart went out to her.  I have a cousin who is very heavy too and she once lost a bunch of weight and has since gained it plus.  I just feel so damn bad that she's struggling just as much as I am.
Maybe when I lose the weight and hit goal I will feel differently but one of my prayers is that I always remain humble in my success and never forget where I've been when it comes to weight.  So part of that humbleness for me is not thinking ill feelings towards those who haven't hit their goals - my heart just sends up a little prayer for them to find their way! 

One of my favorite quotes from my father is - many can handle being poor but few can handle prosperity.  (think about people you know who win the lottery, come into a lot of money etc.) see how they act and portray themselves?  Same theory with weight loss, few can keep the character, humbleness, love for others and general good naturedness when the weight comes off because we want to Roam free and say what we've wanted to say for years - we best be careful how we handle our own prosperity when it comes to our individual success.

Interesting....I, too, have felt relief not excitement whenever seeing somebody larger than me....but I have ALWAYS felt compassion for them.  What a cruel quote!

I think it really depends on the person. It's like guys who look at other guys' penises in the lockeroom to try to compare.  If you self-esteem and can stand your own, I don't think that finding a fatter person than you is at the top of the priority list. Whenever I see a fat person I moreso feel like I can relate... but I never think, "Ha ha! Sucks to be her! At least I am smaller!" I think that often happens amongst the very competitive smaller gals... where it's a difference between being 100lbs and 115lbs, lol

I will say I always look in the room to see ANYONE larger than me and then I go to any other woman.  I feel bad for them especially if they are younger.  Since I have been heavy all my life I know what they are going through.  I wish all insurance companies were required to treat this surgery as they do other debilitating diagnosis es.  I always try to say hi or address a larger person when I am in the same room to help them feel somewhat more at ease. 

I do find it bothersome, but somewhat true at the same time.

I used to "feel better" when I spotted someone more overweight than me.  It made me feel smaller.  Justified in my warped mind that I wasn't all that big.  

I am with Donna, though - now when I see people who are obese, I understand how they may be feeling.

I wish everyone who needed the surgery could get it, although some who do don't appreciate it (referring to a show I saw the other night, The 1/2 ton boy). 

Girl - with all you got going on, you sure do have time to ponder some pretty interesting stuff!

As for me, I'm ashamed to admit it, but yes I too am relieved (not excited) when I see someone clearly much bigger than me. I hate always being the biggest person in the room, always forgetting how wide I am and accidentally knocking something off a table and every other humiliation that goes along with being big. It's a relief to know that I'm not the "worst" when it comes to weight issues and yes, the fact is it's sad to think that I'm glad someone else has "bigger" issues (pun intended) than me.

One thing this makes me think of though is that game we play with friends...you know...the "is he/she bigger than me?" game.  You're out in public and you're trying to figure out how you look to others so you find someone you think might be your size and you ask your friend to compare the two of you.  I do this all the time with my sister. I don't even have to ask the question outloud anymore, I give her a look and then glance at the person in question and she gives me the answer.  What's so sick about this, is the position we're (I'm) putting her or my friend in, it's like asking your husband, "Do these jeans make my butt look fat?"  Are they really going to tell me the truth??? And if they do, do I really want to hear it?  It's not a fair question and it's not fair that I'm relieved that someone else is bigger than me. But quite frankly life isn't fair - why do some people suffer from SMO or cancer or severe injuries or death or whatever! But I do like the poem "The little soul" that someone posted in your post from today - that explains a lot about why we suffer, unfortunately, many people who have never dealt with a weight issue simply don't see being SMO as suffering, but rather they see people who are just lazy and have no will power to stop putting food in their mouth - and that my friend isn't fair!  But you know what - life isn't fair to those people either...because they will never understand the true friendship that many of us on this journey have experienced. And quite honestly, if this is my punishment for being SMO - I can handle that! So maybe life is fair afterall...who knows - I guess it's all dependent on which way you look at the glass - half full or half empty!

All I know is that I LOVES you! SQUEEZES!!!!