Does our mind ever really see us the way we truly are?

I'm just curious....Maybe some of the longer out post-ops could answer this.... I am down to 143, that's 3lbs from my personal goal of 140.  I have bones everywhere now, I can feel them.  People tell me I'm thin, skinny, going  to blow away in the wind, etc.  But when I look in the mirror, I see very little difference from before.  In fact, I'm thinking that I may lower my goal again.  But then I wonder, do I really need to?  Then I look in the mirror and say I should go to 130. I know this is very common and am hopeful that it goes away.  I'm finding that now instead of being thrilled that people comment on my new size, I feel embarrassed.  I just say thank you and smile, but inside I'm thinking that they wouldn't say that if they only knew just how fat I really am.  This morning I was at a garage sale looking at clothes and another customer handed me some jeans and said she could never fit in them, but that I was such a tiny little thing that they would fit me.  I thanked her, but still... Every now and then I'll pass a store window or something and see myself and think who is that?  Can that really be me?  So, why don't I see it in the mirror?  How long does it take for our minds to see us, I mean really see our bodies as they truly are? Thanks everyone.  You have all been so great to me over the last 6 months and I appreciate all your help and love, Debi

YES YES YES but it took me about a year and a couple months... I am this now but I couldnt grasp it before. I didnt trust what I was seeing. It happens honestly... your doing great !

Thank you.  I think I just really needed to hear that I will see the real me eventually.  I didn't think of it as me not being able to trust what I see.  That's a good point.  I guess that on some level it feels like a dream and I'll wake up and be 265 again.  I love being able to come out here and say any thing and have people that understand.  When I try to talk to my friends they just don't understand and think I'm being dramatic and one friend has said that she's worried I'm becoming anorexic.  Honestly!!  They just don't understand.

OOO you got a "comment"   LOL Welcome to the land of unwanted comments that hurt.  :( Bru**** off. Mine was trusting what I saw was so fantastic I was afraid to get too used to it.... nothing had ever worked before. But yes... it comes and one day youll refer to yourself as thin!  That was hard for me to say... sounded to presumputious! Hugs

Hello Debi...so how are you...sounds like you are doing great!! I am finally starting to see myself...still alittle off but it is getting better and easier to accept. It is me and I believe I will not wake up and it will have all been a dream!! Linda Anne and Sandie have helped me with this too...they are so wonderful!! Hope to see you again soon!! Hugs and love.......connie d

Thanks Connie! I think you look so beautiful.  I'm so happy I got to meet you!  I hope to see you again soon, Debi

Thank you Debi....you are so kind. Ditto to you too!!! Hugs, connie d

Hi Debi, As an old old old timer...your head will eventually catch up.  The problem with WLS is that the weight comes off so quick, your head AND your family and friends need time to adjust as well.  Hang in there, take the compliments and smile.  Believe it or not, there will come a time that your weight loss isn't going to be the first thing on people's minds anymore.  It rarely even comes up now with my family and friends.  Maybe an occasional comment of "gee it's great you've kept it off" or something like that.  It will take some time.  Now....I can honestly say I don't really remember that 300 lb me anymore.  I remember what it was like to be fat, don't get me wrong....but it isn't on the surface of my mind - getting in the way of living. You're still a fresh loser...give yourself and others time to get to know the new you.  Soon you won't think "fat" anymore.  This is all part of the journey.

Thanks Lori! This was just one thing I did NOT expect.  I thought that as I lost the weight, I would wake up each day and look in the mirror and marvel at how thin I am becoming.  I know I had some unrealistic expectations. I can't wait until the fat me is gone from my memory and the new me is all I see.... Debi

Even tho I am not at goal yet, I understand what your saying. I still hold up size 12's and go wow... those are small.... and can't believe when they actually fit. I can't believe I can fit my butt into a VERY TIGHT size 10...I can't believe that a 16 is to big for me. I have never been in a 12 in my life!!!! and now I have the hopes of getting into an 8. Something that has always been a pipe dream for me. I know subconciously I didn't think I would ever see below 170..as of today I am 159, and still losing. It's taking me a little more time then most because I didn't use my tool correctly, but now that that is a major priority in my life, It's coming off. I know I was standing next to Kelly last weekend at coffee, and she made the comment that I wasn't that far from her size......Like you, I don't see it. I still see myself as that really huge person. I look in the mirror and see the same old fat girl I've been all my life. But yet when I dress up I get noticed. Even when I don't I do from time to time. I know it will take a long time for my head to catch up with my body. But when you have been overweight since the age of 5, and your 44, It takes a while to relearn. It's funny you posted this, because I was thinking the same thing yesterday and today...Thanks