Funnys to help us smile!!!
PREGNANCY Q & A:
Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.
Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.
Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.
Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody
that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?
Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor,
but pressure. Is she right? !
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant
Q: Is there any reason
I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.
Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
Q: Our baby was born last week.
When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.
'Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly. Leave the rest to God!
'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'
Ha ha those are cute!! I needed some laughs!! Love you!! 
> Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are
> chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men....
> that night all three will wear a leather bodice S&M style, with
> stilettos and mask over their eyes.
>
> After a few days they meet again.....
>
> The engaged girlfriend said: 'The other night, when my boyfriend came
> back home, he found me in the leather bodice, 4' stilettos and mask.
> He said, 'You are the woman of my life, I love you...then we made love
> all night long.'
>
> The mistress stated: 'Oh Yes! The other night we met in the office. I
> was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes
> and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat, he didn't say a word. We
> just had wild sex all night.'
>
> The married one then said: 'The other night I sent the kids to stay at
> my mothers for the night, I got myself ready, leather bodice,
> super stilettos and mask over my eyes. My husband came in from work,
> grabbed the TV remote control and a beer, and said,
> 'Hey Batman, what's for dinner?'
Imperfect does not = unsuccessful
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