Feeling crazy

Hi there, I'm 24 years old, 5'4" and weigh 354lbs. All my life I've been against bariatric surgery in general and was over all happy being chunky. Now that it interferes with my life I've reconsidered. I'm sure you've heard all the usual complaints. I can't go out with friends, can't do the housework well, have no motivation to do anything because it's hard to breathe. I recently started down the road to bariatric surgery and feel like a bumbling idiot. First off I'm not too keen on sharing my medical issues with those around me and prefer to keep it a private issue but my psychiatrist is having issues with that and tells me that I need to share and not keep it to myself. Then when he starts asking about all of the other bad habits I may have and I tell him I have none other than compulsive eating he looks at me like I'm a liar. It's driving me nuts thinking that the psych might tell me that I'm not "sane" enough to get the surgery that my body desperately needs. I am luckier than most, I don't have high cholesterol or high blood pressure; my a1c levels are barely above the normal range and my blood sugar is perfectly normal; I don't have  hormonal imbalances (despite being considered PCOS). Can someone just tell me that I'm not the only one paranoid that someone is going to think that I don't qualify for this surgery? Everyone but my Psych tells me that it would be a good idea, but I'm worried he'll throw a monkey wrench in the whole design!

First - let me be the first to congratulate you on coming to the conclusion that you can't do this alone.   Now - is your psychologist the one that will perform the pysch exam that qualifies you for surgery?  Many times its not - but I'm not sure what program you're going through and how much they would weigh in your "regular" pych's opinion. With that said, you're not paranoid! The whole process of getting approved for surgery is extremely scary and frustrating - you can read many stories about it on this board. Your BMI alone tells me that there really shouldn't be anyone that would deny you this surgery.  My BMI was 52 and I'm 5'8" and weighed 331 at the start - so yours is going to be high - actually it may be one of those cases that because it's that high they might consider it high risk.  However, you're young and good health so that goes in your favor. Sorry...am I rambling? ...causing you more angst?  Don't mean too. Just keep your head up high and know that surgery will happen when it is supposed to happen and not a moment sooner.  I waited and fought with my insurance company and my employer for 4 years before I finally had a friend help me pay for it in Mexico.  I know now that I wasn' t in the right place or state of mind to have surgery when I wanted it - but when I had it all the pieces fit together perfectly. Good luck to you on your journey and keep us updated with your progress! Tracy

I actually have two psychologists, one to help treat my borderline personality disorder and one for the surgery. It's the one for the surgery who looks at me like I'm crazy. My regular Psychologist is a great lady, she fully encourages this surgery and is on board with helping me any way she can. I've been in therapy since I was a little kid. I know I have things that I need to work on but I learned long ago to be honest about my feelings and situations because no one could/would help if I wasn't. I guess I'm just worried because I perceive this doctor as judging me. It's hard to go from learning to like yourself and not worry about being judged, to suddenly being judged and for trying to do the right thing. My regular psychologist suggested that I join a support group but since I have trouble getting around ( I ride the bus) and have the responsibility of taking care of a household she said that this online forum was just as good. FYI- My BMI is 62 and yeah that's scary. I'm lucky enough not to have to fight with my insurance company so far. If there are any tips or suggestions that you can share I'd much appreciate it!

Hi Hon!  First off let me congratulate you on persuing a healthier lifestyle!!  Now, let me say this as a WLS patient who has been there and had issues that the psych doc didn't not address.  I applaud your psych!  He/She is just wanting to make sure you are ready because there is sooooo much involved with WLS that you are unware of.  My pysch passed me on and shouldn't have AT THAT TIME.  I had issues in the past that I thought I had dealt with and was over and in reality was not.  That might not be your case but I thought I'd share.  So, after 5 months of lossing the weight (this happened last May) I had a mental breakdown and could not handle all the changes that my body was going thru and realated to Obesity and why I overate and became obese.  I fortunately got help and am better.  SOOOOO, don't look at this as he/she trying to prevent you but rather prepare you  THEY want you healthy inside and out....hope that helps and hang in there YOU will get the WLS eventually! HUGS!

Hey stranger!  Congratulations for coming here when you're feeling crazy.  If nothing else, we're all here to tell you YOU ARE NORMAL!!!  Any paranoia, fear, anger, or other emotion you feel while on this journey is totally normal.  Keep coming here, we'll keep reinforcing that. Your BMI (although I didn't calculate it) has GOT to be high enough to qualify you - that you don't really have any co-morbs at this point is probably a blessing in disguise!  Many people NEED to have co-morbs in order to qualify!  Just keep taking the steps the doctors and your insurance tell you to take, and this will happen.  I didn't want WLS for the longest time, either!  But I did start to develop several co-morbs, and my PCP finally suggested that I consider it.  Twice.  First time, I blew him off.  Second time he said it, I looked at him and said "Do YOU think I should???"  I thank GOD he had the balls to tell me YES.  'cuz I'm a much lighter, healthier person today for it.  And you are so young!  (dang, I could be your MOTHER!)  Get healthy now, you'll be thankful for the rest of your life!

Welcome to the boards. I'm so happy for you that you have decided to do something about your healthy. I was about the same weight as you when I had my surgery. I also did not have any co-morbities. But, I did live with the fear of not being approved for this surgey that I wanted so bad. Its very normal to be nervous though this process. For me I did not have any issues with getting approved and I hope and pray that you have that same experience.

Wishing you all the best on your journey. If you need to talk feel free to PM me anytime.

Take care.